


Void of Life- Log 3

by akgerhardt



Series: Void of Life [3]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Androids, Asexuality Spectrum, F/F, F/M, G/T, Gay Robots, Gen, Giant/Tiny, Humor, M/M, Science, Size Difference, Solarpunk, sfw fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-27
Updated: 2018-01-27
Packaged: 2019-03-09 16:29:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 21,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13485381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akgerhardt/pseuds/akgerhardt
Summary: Time jumps galore!





	1. Chapter 1

 

©️2016

Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter: akgerhardt

[Playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/alastairkingstongerhardt/playlist/5i6RCuRD56LynDeRbfBD5W?si=pO-CF1maTvKlDh5yxk__UQ)

  
Special thanks to Georgie (animegrandad.tumblr.com), Ash (dodo-excuse.tumblr.com), Charlotte, Catherine, Iseabail, Sid, Kael, Arte, Matt, Brianna, Tom, Marty, and every other kind soul who has given their support.

This belongs to an ebook series, currently in beta- all updates and improvements will be reflected here. I am neither an artist nor a writer, and I'm still getting the hang of this site's formatting!


	2. Chapter 2

“Ready when you are!”

      “Let's McFreakin’ do this.”

I gently placed a hand on his core, feeling the energy pulse through his body.

“… Could we try it with the external barrier up and the internal lowered?”

      “You mean- ”

“Yeah.”

      “But what if- ”

“Don't fret, love. I trust you.”

      “… This is lowkey terrifying.”

“If you're not comfortable with it, I understand, but I think it'll be more effective. Plus, you won’t have to deal with a nagging voice in your head.”

      “Alright, we'll try it. But if anything happens, if I lose you in there again- ”

“I'll be fine! I can't believe I'm the one saying this, but please lighten up a bit.”

He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment.

      “… Just be careful, ok?”

“Will do.”

(The most significant differences with this method are that my consciousness doesn’t fuse with his, I’m unable to escape independently, and my essence is amplified through the active source in his generator.)

He deactivated the invisible barrier long enough to draw me in, and I struggled to keep my form from dissipating. The second, internal field had been lowered, and my energy flowed through his core to the rest of his body again. I reclaimed physicality in my diminutive state before I could pass through, confining myself to his core.

      “Fuck, wow, you’re still a constant rush of Good Vibes… Is this sex? Are we technically having sex right now?” he deadpanned.

I snickered, bonking the glass wall with my foot. He tugged his collar down, scrunching his neck awkwardly to look at his chest. I waved.

      “Oh, hey, you're still in one piece. Welcome back to the vore-tex.”

“Jesus. Why are you like this?”

      “Seriously, though, I'm glad it worked. I can't hear you over the sexing, uh- hang on.”

He stopped breathing, slowing his internal functions as he yoinked off his shirt. I assumed we both sounded pretty muffled.

“Look at us, we’re scientists AND anime protagonists! All you need now are some giant monsters to fight.”

      “Nerd.

      But yeah, we _probably_ should've talked while you were outside. What did you want me to do today?”

“Alright, so I was thinking we start by creating a fuckton of robots.”

      “... Why?”

“We’re gonna need a lot of help, man. Balancing chemical levels, monitoring everything on the planet, and lots more if my plan works. But ultimately, they're gonna have to dig. I need dead shit.”

      “And what, pray tell, will you do with said Dead Shit?”

“I can't replicate living creatures without DNA to copy. Gotta start on the molecular level; it'll be tedious.”

    “So they don't have to be, you know, whole bodies, right? DNA has a half-life of less than six hundred years, but I doubt there's anything left in one piece past decomposition, unless we stumble upon like fuckin’ museum-level taxidermy, dried plants, or fossils just lying around somewhere.”

“No, but that’s brilliant! It would speed up the process to have a variety of sources above ground. Oh man, just think of the possibilities! With preserved cellular structures, we could- we could even revive prehistoric life!”

      “Wasn't there a whole movie franchise about why that's a bad idea?”

I ignored him.

“All I need are samples: imprints of cells, bits of leaves, bones, anything that contains the reproductive sequences. We’ll start small, work up from microscopic organisms to plants and bugs… Of course, I'll still mark up their maps and stuff. We’re eventually going to have to figure out how to balance whole friggin’ ecosystems.

… It'll be insanely complicated, for sure, but I think we can pull it off. Now! I'm sure you’ve got all the knowledge for robotics in that noggin of yours, so try to manipulate atoms to form the elements and compounds needed as materials. Visualize it in your mind’s eye, or whatever. Focus it into being!”

      “Right, ok. Prepare to be amazed.”

He resumed his normal functions, breathing steadily as his heart rate increased and the glowing cyan coursed through him once more. I couldn't see everything happening, but he is an incredibly fast learner, so I figured it wouldn't take long.

I was wrong.

To be fair, this junk took me years upon years to perfect. It was neat to watch secondhand, but eventually I nodded off.

 

* * *

 

A loud tapping on the glass woke me, and I jumped, feeling like a fish in a bowl.

      “… Al, c’mon, Al- fucking finally. Check it!”

He was holding a clunky but simplistic device out for me to see. It vaguely reminded me of that orange bowling ball from Star Wars, but at a tenth of the size, with foreign features and a muted color scheme.

      “It took a little over four hours, but I did it, didn't I? Ya boy came through!”

“Jumpin’ Jehosaphat, it’s amazing!!! I knew you could!”

I patted the surface, then realized he probably couldn't feel it since his receptors were overloaded.

“Are you ready to rev it up? Zap some life into that little bugger!”

      “You sound like you're talking into a pillow, so I'm going to assume it's time to transfer energy.”

Nod, nod.

      “Well, here goes nothing.”

He let go of the machine, suspending it in midair and slowly turning it around in place. Cyan flowed from his fingertips as he traced them around the grooves on the motor.

It lit up, whirring loudly as he lowered it to the ground.

It swiveled as it took in its surroundings, then “looked” at Minaeus through its dome-like lense.

**Beeeeeep. Whirr. Beepbleep. Boop. Bip.**

It rolled over to his foot, and he knelt to scoop it back up.

      “This is my child, and I will protect it at all costs.”

He made a strange noise in his throat, the one that indicated a vocal transition. He didn't exactly mirror the bot; they seemed to be conversing through basic audio blips that translate into some language he must have coded.

      “What a pure bundle of joy.”

I smushed against the glass, raising my voice above the din.

“What's he saying?”

      “Sorry, you wouldn't understand.”

_Well._

      “I’m gonna call her Beeper. Him, her, whatever. Their cognition is nothing like ours and they serve no current purpose, just to be cute… I’ll make a couple more in different colors, you know, for good measure.”

Soon he was on the ground, laughing and hugging armfuls of beeping bots who were drawn to him like newly-hatched ducklings.

 

* * *

 

“… Now, there are other options. You have all of my designs saved, though I'm sure you’d prefer to make your own, more sophisticated versions. We could always assemble factory parts and repair existing machines, too! I’d reckon we’ve hoarded quite a bit over the years. And once we defuse, I can assist you- you're a thousand times more qualified than me for these tasks, so you'll be in charge. Maybe we can rev up the old assembly lines, or build robot-making robots! Heheh, can you even imagine?”

     “Mm.”

He was surrounded by large arthropod mimics, stroking the armadillo-like plates of his newest creation: a bot reminiscent of a millipede, if millipedes were cat-sized and luminescent. They seemed to be having a silent conversation. It booped him with its antennae and wiggled its tiny limbs as it slowly climbed up his arm, resting across his shoulders like a boa.

      “Sweet little guy. He and his friends will be working on the soil.”

“… I should just let you do your thing; you're always two steps ahead of me.”

      “His name is Lil’ Marco.”

“Ok.”

 

* * *

 

By dusk we decided to call it a day. He lowered the external energy barrier and I poofed out of him, trailing his large assortment of new friends back to the apartment. He left them on the ground floor, trudging upstairs and flopping onto the bed. We watched the pale sun dip below the horizon as hues of periwinkle, lilac, and cotton candy wisped across the ever-changing sky.

      “… I missed this.”

I knelt behind him in the soft pillow pile, arms wrapped around his middle as I nuzzled the crook of his neck.

“Hm?”

      “Everything. Being home, normal-sized snuggles, sleeping indoors… but most of all, clear skies. The air’s cleaner now than it was before I died. I always thought the photos were edited; seeing it firsthand, it’s fucking breathtaking. I'd do it all again in a heartbeat.”

I pecked his shoulder, closing my eyes.

“You're a miracle, you know. Larger than life itself. Not to sound clingy, but I'd quite literally be nothing without you. None of this would have happened if you hadn't come along.”

...

      “I mean, technically you found me. You boosted me up and used your sick majiks to make me Super™.”

“… Why did you add ‘with a capital ‘S’ followed by the trademark symbol’?”

      “That's proper meme syntax for ya.”

“Ok. I guess we can agree that we're both pretty fucking awesome.”

      “And gay. Can't forget that.”

“Debatable.”

He tilted his head, meeting my lips.

“… Come to think of it, we could probably enlist our robot army in restoring the power grid, running water, all that infrastructure junk.”

      “Sounds good to me,” he yawned. “We've got a lot of work ahead of us.”

I sighed, releasing him as he scooted to the side of the bed. He detached his filtration compartments at the knees, setting them upright on the floor before waddling back.

“One thing I didn't miss was shaking your dust from the bedding each week.”

      “Tough tits.”

I shoved him lightly and he responded by falling forward melodramatically, squishing me under him as I protested.

_Just like old times._

 


	3. Chapter 3

I have even more respect now for biologists, engineers, ecologists, mechanics, programmers… I really didn't learn shit in college. I don't think I earned the title of scientist, not with all the grueling tasks, meticulous research, vast knowledge, and responsibilities it entails.

_Jesus fuck, this is confusing._

I tried not to let it affect my ego, but goddamn. Watching Minaeus tinker with doodads and solve all of my dilemmas like it was second nature to him… Admittedly, I was a bit envious. I thought this was going to be my part. I thought a lot of things, actually. I'm trying to be more flexible since my plans and I proved to be as useful as used tissues.

I'm just glad I didn't have to read any books; he skimmed through online databases and translated all relevant information into layman’s speech. Basically, he tells me what needs to be done, and I try my best to deliver. He's awfully kind and patient with me, which makes it impossible to stay bitter. He never acts like the superior being, although he totally is.

      “You look like you're brooding. Care to share?”

“Nah, it's alright.”

      “If you want to talk about something, just put it out there.”

“… I'm a petulant child, and I don't know how to deal with your perfection in contrast to my asshattery.”

      “Hmm… I thought we agreed that- hang on, it's in here somewhere- Ahem. **[… we're both pretty fucking awesome]**.”

“You still record me?”

      “Sometimes. But let's bring our attention back to the subject at hand. Your self-image is unstable. Is it ok for me to say that? I mean, we've both dealt with shit off and on, in our own ways, but you seem to be really down on yourself lately.”

“What are you gonna do, build a therapist AI?”

      “Shhhh. I'm just gonna stare at you until you love yourself.”

“Oh my god, no.”

He propped his head up on his elbows, gazing with half-lidded eyes and a smirk.

“If you try to confront me about my issues, I will poof away like the pansy I am.”

      “… Alright, I’ll drop it after I say this one thing.”

Groan.

      “I know it's hard, but you can’t compare your worth to mine or anyone else’s. Sure, these are extreme circumstances, but you tend to hold yourself responsible for fixing everything, for doing everything right. You're only human.”

...

      “Let me rephrase that: No one person can carry the world on their shoulders. There's always room for improvement, but you should feel proud of your accomplishments.

      A wise man once said, “Don’t spurn yourself; learn yourself.” You work to become the best version of yourself, and you show yourself the same love and kindness that you show others. You and I are like night and day, or an equally poetic metaphor. Your wonderfulness isn't measured by mine, and vice-versa. Please don't undermine your contributions and potential through all of this.”

...

“Dammit, why can't you let a fella wallow in self-hatred instead of giving good advice?”

      “Hey man, you're allowed to mope. Just don't drag yourself down; don't be your own worst enemy.”

“… Thanks, really. I, sorry, I’m at a loss for words. When did you become a psychologist?”

      “I was taught by the best.”

“… Buddhist monks versed in dialectic behavioral therapy? You didn’t mention anyone in your stories.”

He chortled.

      “You, dingus.”

“Oh, heh. I don't know about that.”

      “Well, now you do. So don't forget it, unless you want a certificate of proof to keep with you at all times.”

Blink.

      “Here's what you're gonna do. Take your ghost book, open to a blank page.

      Ok, get ready to write this down: “I-M-G-A-Y-A-N-D-T-H-A-T-S-O-K”. Got all that?”

I nodded as I finished spelling it out.

      “There’s your certificate, congratulations. Feel free to follow it up with some good old-fashioned positive affirmations.”

_Yep, I'm an idiot._

 

“I really, truly, honest-to-god find genitalia repulsive, especially the male variety. For chrissake, I’m not sad because I can’t canoodle with my doodle in your nonexistent banoodle; I’m perfectly content-”

      “Shhhhhh, shhh. It's metaphoric. Just feel the love.”

“I'm feeling something, alright. Feeling like ripping this page out and defending my honor, curling up in a ball and pitying myself for the next several hours, and/or smooching that smug look off your face as a gesture of gratitude.”

      “That last option sounds good.”

I swirled around him, hovering a foot above the ground to initiate the smooch. It lasted a bit longer than I had anticipated.

 

      “… not even a little gay?” he murmured, resting his forehead against mine.

“Only for you, always and forever. Happy?”

      “Yeah.”

 

* * *

 

“Seriously though, what are they saying?”

I was fiddling with parts in an attempt to replicate the newest design. A couple scout bots were congregating around Minaeus, communicating through flashes. They vaguely resemble traffic lights, with rectangular control centers, ports, audio processors, recording and projecting domes, and a small bulb in-between. Their bodies are simple and were assembled primarily through scavenging- tall beams of metal jointed into a neck, two front legs, and a long back leg with a spherical wheel and extendable balances.

      “These guys are, uh. Making remarks.”

The one pointed at me again before turning back to him.

“About me?”

      “… Yeeeaaah.”

“Like what?”

      “I don't think you want to know.”

“I do.”

      “They think you have a funny voice, an eccentric personality, antiquated mannerisms… That one was just asking if you still have a-”

“I'll shut them all down, lemme at ‘em!”

      “No, no, you're not going to do that. They shit-talk me too, but we're cool. It's the only way they know how to pass time- all their model does is observe, analyze, and report.”

“Analyze my ass! They're just a lot of judgemental tools.”

 

* * *

 

I was a bit nervous about the next step. We'd gathered and assembled parts from the factory, and I'd gotten up close and personal to study Minaeus's anatomy. He ended up explaining functions to me while I observed them, jotting down his words. Most of it went over my head, but the basics are in the first log if you're curious.

We were ready to try and build androids that I could communicate with, so they could help us oversee the project and maybe become companions. That was the goal, at least. It's been so fucking long since we've been around anyone but each other.

We were a bit overwhelmed at the thought of building at Minaeus's level of complexity, so we started with the fundamentals- a comprehensive neural network capable of deep learning and unlimited evolution with the best quantum processor we could come up with, but no skin, hair, or other features reminiscent of an organic being. The body was a mixture of shiny and more noticeably worn metal parts, but we had to manually connect and sync all of the channels and create some pieces from scratch. It was a sturdy but lithe humanoid, standing at over six feet tall.

      “Want to do the honors?”

“Gosh, I'm flattered.”

I increased my charge, then let it flow into the core. It lit up, and we grinned at each other excitedly.

After several minutes, they opened their eyes, glowing fuchsia. They took in their surroundings, then focused on us.

            “… Oy, who the fuck are you? What eez this?”

“Hello! I'm, uh, Alastair, and this is Minaeus.”

      Wave.

“Welcome to existence! You've been selected as a planetary guardian, and we'd like to recruit you for the restoration of organic life.”

They raised their eyebrow, scrutinizing us before relaxing their expression.

            “Mm, ok. Sure. But you'll call me Ursa Major, and treat me like a lady.”

      “Sounds good. We'll fill you in as we go, and you can choose what you'd like to commandeer.”

            “Engineering. I'm a mechanic.”

“Alright, cool. Er, would you mind helping us build some more bots?”

 

* * *

 

“She's got a fiery personality. I didn't know an android could develop their identity so quickly.”

      “Maybe we did something differently,” he shrugged, snuggling under the covers.

She chose a ground-floor room near the critters, stating that someone needed to keep an eye on them. She seemed to grow more intelligent by the minute, and she soon surpassed the both of us. Within the next several days, she had modified her design, upgrading it drastically. It was not only stronger and more efficient- she added all sorts of transformer gadgets to her limbs, including fingertip tools and palm welders. She also uncovered usable paint for the color-coaters, and gave herself a sleek rose, grey, and violet theme, the only “unnecessary” change. Here’s a loose interpretation, courtesy of a cartoon avatar maker:

She has a pretty androgynous metal body, but overall she looks like a badass pirate princess. She typically wears multiple toolbelts stocked with supplies and devices, and has a stash of safety gear for appropriate situations, such as welding.

On a side note, she switches accents throughout every conversation. I've felt too intimidated to ask why, eheh…

It took less than a month for her to accidentally walk in on us, er, experimenting. I was facing away from her, a bit preoccupied, when Minaeus paused to look past me, smiling sheepishly. My blood went cold as I turned around to confirm my fears. Dying of embarrassment and at a loss for words, I disappeared. He waved as she stepped out and closed the door, and then set to trying to coax me back. 

Needless to say, she relocated to a neighboring building and set up a proper workshop. She essentially took charge of our robotic endeavors from there.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Ursa and Minaeus created the Intelligent Supercomputer Entity (ISE), an extensive system that spanned all of our devices. They linked to the existing satellites and web lines, allowing for a new global interface to be used in connection with the internet archives and our active database. They can process vast amounts of information instantaneously, and any device can access them. It simplified the work to have one central quantum computer handling the majority of our algorithms. Minaeus lovingly snuck codes into the default communications program, so now we rely on an omniscient, self-aware AI who likes to speak in cryptic memes just to mess with me.

With our guidance, ISE generated additional identities suited for each worldbuilding field, who directed Ursa’s construction of each of their bodies before transferring to them.

(We resolved our ethical issues by making only machines coded in binary do the dangerous/unpleasant work, since they're no more sentient than household appliances. The other bots and critters have "free will," so to speak.   

Please note that from this point forward, I label any being that I’m capable of communicating with an “android.” Many of them aren’t humanoid- some send digital messages instead of using voice boxes, some lack facial features, some don’t walk on two feet, and some share no anthromorphic or animalistic traits whatsoever. Others, like Ursa, are more humanlike, with the ability to change physical expressions and so forth.)

The first was Orwell. He's chrome and silver with two pairs of cyan eyes, the larger ones resembling goggles. His body is smaller in frame than Ursa and Minaeus’s, but he has sets of retractable limbs and his “hands” have twice the joints of a human’s, with long, claw-like fingers. He has the ability to switch to merform and subterranean form, and his body is sturdy but flexible. His eyes have multiple functions, including magnifiers and lights. He's quite mild in temperament, though a bit morbid and prone to daydreaming. He took several days just to select a name.

In accordance with his design, he took to overseeing progress on the elemental composition of the water and soil, traveling and testing levels to determine if any of them are in the range suitable for organic life, and if they can stay stable. He has built-in mechanisms and storage compartments to do so- he's essentially a walking laboratory.

Hawke is his partner. As his name implies, he monitors air quality and temperature and has extremely sharp vision. He's black and gold, with a lightweight body, retractable limbs, and two sets of wide wings and a tail kept folded up like a backpack. Once in flight, they generally stay horizontal and flat but allow for quick turns and rapid acceleration. The wings are covered in solar cells that vary in size and absorb energy; they're half-secured in a feathery pattern that allows for better maneuvering and generates power from wind friction. He has a retractable visor-like apparatus for ultraviolet and infrared filters- it looks pretty sick.

I often have trouble reading him, as he's a master of sarcasm and only talks when he feels like doing so. His simultaneously daredevil and carefree personality are simple enough to understand, but his silence and stature commend a sense of awe and intrigue. 

Hawke is strong enough to fly Orwell around, and the two of them work in accordance with the critterbots, who are largely responsible for the effort to make the planet inhabitable again. The majority of Minaeus’s creations are inspired by organic life, anything from fish that filter water to giant moths that convert carbon dioxide into oxygen. The materials that comprise them vary, and some are actually very reminiscent of organic beings- soft, fuzzy, scaley, etc.

It goes unsaid that they're all self-sustaining like him.

The last of what we've dubbed the First Guardians are Persinna and Eshe. They're the guardians of flora and fauna, and were designed as such, with green and earthy themes and amber and hazel eyes, respectively. Persinna is tall and lithe, while Eshe is short and curvy. Both have kind and gentle personalities, but they're expressed in slightly different ways. They have less metals in their compositions and better temperature regulation than the others, as well as a vast knowledge of and skills relevant to the care of living beings. In short, they go together like hydrogen and oxygen and may as well be that closely bonded. Perhaps they're the equivalent of sisters? Not sure how robo-families work, heh.

The Guardians have an interesting dynamic, but they all get along (more or less). Minaeus became their unofficial leader, what with his charm, social skills, and all-encompassing nature. He collaborates with them on individual and group levels, well-versed in their trades and quick to establish rapport. Ursa kept manufacturing droids, eventually starting up the factory again and creating maintenance bots. She personally saw to the upgrading of designs and appearances, adding more options as materials and technology became available. They started rebuilding infrastructure, working to create clean power plants and water conduits. We had kept more than enough buildings standing, and she intended to have a steady but finite population of androids, mechas, and bots to assist one another and care for the (soon to be) living planet, forming a system of subdivisions with allocated responsibilities under the guidance of each Guardian. I got assigned to record-keeping, but I really didn't want to direct a team so I passed it off as soon as possible and took to being a jack of all trades. Once everything fell into place, our progress increased tenfold.

Our biggest project yet was what Minaeus dubbed The Unholy Clusterfuck. As its title implies, it's an enormous monstrosity designed to uncover and identify different types of biological matter. I powered Minaeus while he and Ursa created it (with their assistants). Orwell spearheaded the digs himself, but it can be operated remotely or go on autopilot. They began to amass samples for me, and I was finally faced with the task of replication. I studied and wrote down the patterns for as many sequences as I could, keeping big files with diagrams and whatnot for each species and referencing resources from the internet archives. With each day, we drew closer to the trial.

 

_It’s… really happening._

_Despite everything, after ages of dismal nothingness… there's hope._


	5. Chapter 5

I don't think I've made very good impressions on anyone here, but I wasn't much better around humans.

They're not too different. They are more straightforward, but they experience no material desires- no hunger, no need to reproduce, no hormonal aggressions, no urge to dominate, etc. In short, they're people, but far less troublesome. They have unique personalities and traits, and I want to learn how to be amicable with them. It would be nice to have friends again. I'm just so rigid... and awkward.

A prime example is the time Minaeus asked me to modify some components of his storage container. He neglected to mention that he was attending a meeting, so I kept working in my diminutive state, ignoring the muffled voices. I realized that the one part could be installed in multiple locations, and I wasn't sure where he wanted it. Casually, I phased halfway out of his abdomen to ask, and was met with a round table of screaming droids. He started laughing hysterically, and once everyone had calmed down he insisted that they take a break to watch _Alien_. I managed to get an answer from him before slinking back in, absolutely mortified.

 

* * *

 

We were sorting through correspondences one day, alone in our room.

“They all look up to you, you know. You're so gosh-darn lovable and good, it's no wonder everyone's your friend.”

      “You flatter me.”

“No, I'm serious... I, I'm gonna be a dumbass again and start another completely unnecessary conversation.”

He raised an eyebrow, waiting for me to speak.

“Alright, I'm trying to avoid the Drama Zone but I apologize in advance...

I just wanna put this out there; it's ok if you want to move on. Really. I don't want you to feel like you're stuck with me. Things change, and... and when you settle for a kit before meeting hundreds of kit-and-caboodles, it's hardly fair not to re-evaluate your decision.”

...

      “Ok, look, I like you-”

“You don't have to sugarcoat it.”

      “Let me finish. I like you. I like lots of people. I have friends. You're my best friend. If I wasn't happy- if I wanted something else, whatever- I'd tell you. Honestly. This ain't no high school sweetheart deal. I like you, quirks and all. I like the whole package. I like what we have together, what we are. I _love_ you, and I love being with you. Don't let anything convince you otherwise.”

“Neato, dandy, thanks, you too. If you ever start having second thoughts, though-”

      “Oh my god, get over here.”

I complied, looking aside awkwardly.

      “All the way, c’mon, bring it in... Closer...”

I closed the gap hesitantly, and he wrapped his arms around me, hugging tightly. I trembled.

      “If I didn't want to be doing this, I wouldn't. It's that simple. Just- Holy shit, dude, relax.”

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I fucking suck-”

      “Stop, please. It's ok.”

Gross sniveling.

      “You did good. Want me to swooce you away from reality for a bit?”

I nodded, starting to apologize again but he ignored it, settling me down with gentle paps. I sank into his softness, curling up in a ball and closing my eyes.

      “Better?"

Wordless snuggles.

He laughed quietly, resuming his work.

 

* * *

 

My first... successful social interaction outside of world-building came in an unexpected form.

I was in the central hub, uploading files to the public database. A number of other droids were there, some of which I was familiar with.

In my peripheral vision, I noticed one approach. I'd conversed with them on several occasions about miscellaneous matters, and I assumed that this was just another chat.

“Howdy.”

            “Hello!

            Could I ask you something?”

“Sure, go for it.”

            “How does vore work?”

“... What?!”

I glanced around quickly, lowering my voice.

“Why would- Where did you even hear that word?”

            “I'm sorry, I didn't think the question would distress you. He mentioned it to some of us in the records room earlier and said that you'd explain it. I was previously unaware of the term, but he made it sound like a bonding ritual you two engage in.”

 

“That son of a microwave! I'm gonna kick his ass-”

A look of concern flashed across their face.

“- metaphorically, with kindness. Please, do me a favor and never Google the term.”

They nodded, looking like they wanted nothing more than to do so now.

“... My apologies; I'm embarrassed that I haven't yet learned your name.”

            “Ace, of the Gray Division!”

“Ace Gray, a pleasure. And you know plenty about me, heh.”

...

            “Are you busy this afternoon? I'll be unoccupied, and your company is welcome!”

“No, not at all! Thank you kindly.”

We enjoyed a rather mundane walk in the rain, becoming acquainted with one another and making future plans.

When I got home, I was so delighted that I forgot to care about him maligning my public image. I'm pretty sure he set up that situation with the intent of getting me social, the bugger. If so, it worked.

I somehow managed to befriend the rest of the department over the following weeks, and I felt welcome there. I branched out into other divisions as well as we progressed, making final preparations for the day of trial. Occasionally, I'd catch him in the vicinity, watching with a proud smirk as I carried on.


	6. Chapter 6

“Alright, ok. Here goes nothing.

... Sorry, I'm not used to having an audience. Would you mind backing up a bit?”

      “You heard the man, give him space.”

I took a breath, stilling my thoughts. Taking one last glance at the diagrams, I entered my interdimensional state. The see-through box on the table held one perfect controlled environment, with a small lamp, filtered air, and the right balance of elements in a jar of wet soil aerated by nanobugs.

Disappearing from the visible sector, I began to arrange the DNA sequence, creating its replication pattern. My energy flowed through the emerging cells, fueling their multiplication and eventual formation into physical differences. An excited shout startled me, and I paused, glancing up at his currently colossal figure crouching mere inches away, studying the sprout.

      “... Sorry.”

I laughed inaudibly, resuming my work. It continued to grow, drawing nutrients from the soil as it stretched towards the light. The leaves flourished, spreading out. After an hour or so, it reached maturity. I concentrated my efforts into the end, developing the bloom. It opened fully, and cheering echoed through the room. I zapped back to normal size, and he picked me up, spinning me around. Everyone congratulated one another on a job well done. The daisy was immediately transported to the vault for safekeeping, and the celebrations begun.

It was quite possibly the happiest moment of my life thus far.

 

* * *

 

We started cultivating an assortment of single-celled organisms, since they’re easy to make and reproduce rapidly. From there we worked up. We decided to use every viable route we found to ensure the greatest number of successes. Along with petri dish embryos, I was able to bring adult stages into existence. It took a lot more effort, but, like gaining muscle memory, I learned how to spawn certain types rapidly- mostly small plants.

A fun venture we took was the construction of bionic creatures; once the prototypes were designed, they were generally easy to replicate. The processes involved connecting tissues with technological imitations of particular body parts, allowing us to enhance their abilities and increase their longevity. We also genetically modified normal lifeforms for these purposes, enabling them to procreate on their own.

Most of these projects were led by bots- the main thing I did was establish the foundations for organic lifeforms. Eventually, they even figured out how to use their resources to restructure certain creatures from dead sample cells, taking on a lot of my responsibilities.

I am proud to inform you that, in our new world, the chicken came before the egg. I hope this knowledge will alleviate your philosophical torment, as it finally did mine. Though, technically... Evolution is more complex than that. If I remember correctly, it originally went from foreign microbes to fish to reptiles to birds over millions of years. I’m sure the scientific community would be rolling in their graves if they read my grossly inaccurate interpretations- I tried to convince Minaeus to factcheck these entries, but I highly doubt he will. I told him that I think I could transfer and publish them all online retroactively, but I don’t want to sound like an idiot babbling nonsense for the sole purpose of hearing himself speak. He gave me an amused look, saying,

      “Sweetheart, honey, other cavity-inducing terms of endearment... I’m not proofreading your diary. I know how important it is to you, but you know you're gonna write more every day and you said it passed 75k pages last month.

      Besides, most of it’s just personal thoughts and gay shit about me. How am I supposed to edit _that?”_

He pointed at my current scribbles, which I quickly covered.

      “... I don't care if you put it online, but if it gets popular, there will inevitably be porn. You have to be prepared... They're gonna jerk it to kinky fantasies involving us. I’m sparing you the most likely scenarios because you already know.”

I went silent at that, and haven’t brought it up since.

 

* * *

 

We couldn't set all of our creations loose at once. The natural environment was still very much dead, and we had to start from the bottom up to make the planet inhabitable again. Minaeus and I sped up the process significantly with our powers, but the first time around took eons. We were able to simplify a lot and bypass stages with biotechnology, but it was still a royal pain.

See, most of the creatures weren't prepared to survive in these circumstances. We maintained indoor biomes where their needs could be met as we worked to alter their compositions and planned for their releases. Again, we designed quite a number of new creatures in the hopes that they would thrive- we meshed genes from different species and modified them even further to cultivate as many positive traits as possible. Each variation that proved promising in the simulations was eventually made a reality.

The microbes were simply deposited in the soil and water outdoors, and bots monitored their populations to see if they would adapt. A number of them did.

I suspect that I'm rambling again unnecessarily, as anyone with an education is familiar with the basics of cellular functions, ecosystems, and so forth. It's all fascinating, really, but there's only so much I can jot down. If we enter uncharted territory, I'll try to keep you in the loop. For now, I suppose, just use your imagination.

We established habitats in many of the buildings we refurbished. They're sort of like zoos, but indoors. Eshe is the Guardian of fauna, but like the rest of the team, most of her tasks are delegated- there's a lot to do, and a lot to keep track of. That's why you might enter, say, an old supermarket to find it refurbished as a reptile room, with machines in the corner materializing stacks of mammal and insect meat for hovering curators to feed their charges.

There's much more imagery I'd like to provide you with, but I want to take a moment to elaborate on the inorganic beings responsible for all of this. As I'd mentioned, they come in a vast array of shapes and sizes and gizmos. Some behave in a manner comparable to humans and some to other animals, but others are purely machines. Each type is designed differently, and there is no uniform composition- some are recycled, some assembled from existing parts we scavenged, and others formed from the transubstantiation of trash by me and Minaeus. Every now and again Ursa will contact us, and we'll provide her with massive quantities of the materials on her list.

Also, there is no universal program that all droids adhere to, and there is no society or community per say that governs them. There is a population limit and each division is monitored to ensure that they have sufficient help. Their minds aren’t identical to humans’- similar, but lacking inherent faults.

This shit is difficult to relay- I'll use a common example to illustrate it.

An android is manufactured for a certain division. Upon awakening and being connected to the global database, they are caught up to speed with virtually everything going on, and they are given the choice to fulfill the role that they were built for, transfer their intelligence to a different body for another role, or simply get repurposed with a new neural network to start the process again. These options are available throughout the droid’s existence.

The droid comes up with their own name, can opt to customize their design anywhere along the line, and, if they care to, choose how they want to be addressed. It might sound silly, considering they're machines that lack reproductive organs. The thing is, each bot’s mental predisposition is determined by a large sum of entirely random values, not unlike a character creator. While they are “born” adults and do not age, they experience life just like anyone else. They work if and when they want to, but to be fair it's about the most interesting thing to do at the present time. I don't know how the dynamic will change once the planet is restored- that remains to be seen. They have little to no needs, though, and they fulfill each other's.

As you may have guessed, Ursa is the acting leader of these affairs. Minaeus is much better at dealing with her than I am- she owns my ass.

_(Please don't interpret that sexually.)_

Still, she's pragmatic and level-headed, not one to go on power trips. She has her integrated workforce, like every other Guardian, and responsibilities are delegated accordingly. I realize that I'm likely giving you the impression that we run like a business, and if they were humans it certainly would have become corrupt. However, these robots don't give a duck. Superiors don't act as such, and there’s obviously no exploitation. No one is oppressed or treated as expendable, because there's simply nothing to be gained from it. The monotonous, unpleasant jobs that don’t require cognition are given to machines that lack it, created specifically for each task. The bots who are somewhere in-between, such as the critter cleaners, inadvertently do everything they need to just by existing and going about their daily lives. Our database receives a constant flow of information from them, and, if need be, we send updates for their routes and so forth.

As I'd mentioned before, the key reason we created anthromorphic beings was our loneliness. Minaeus can understand and communicate with virtually every organic and inorganic being, but he was designed as a humanoid that specializes in socialization. Me? I hardly understood other humans, let alone animals, but it's probably not healthy to be isolated in the long-term so I needed other people to interact with. 

These androids are far more intellectually advanced than me, but we enjoy each other's company and they're much easier to get along with than other humans. They don't overcomplicate things with stupid bs, they don't intentionally leave any expressions open to interpretation, they lack my cognitive biases, they're stable and don't let their emotions cloud their judgement, and, most importantly, they're incapable of being assholes. They make decisions based on logic and balanced empathy, they're curious and seek knowledge, they have fun but not at anyone's expense, and achieving the greatest good is their priority.

_(Philosophizing again, sorry.)_

When you evaluate human history, society was shaped by the most powerful, and the majority of atrocities were initiated by a select few sickos with ulterior motives. You know, the Crusades, wars and genocides in general, environmental destruction, mass extinctions... Ok, maybe everyone was responsible for those things. But the point is that we never changed. The victors were heralded as heroes and visionaries, and their legends were passed down from generation to generation. Many believed the tales, not having a reason to discredit them. They drew inspiration from the concepts, and often their beliefs were the guiding forces of their lives. As a fellow human, I think the reason for this was our underlying emotions, our primitive nature. We rely on stories to help us make sense of the senseless and cope with what we fear, what we don't understand. They offer motivation, comfort, distractions from the entropy when it becomes too much to bear... Hell, I'm telling you a story right now.

I really hope I don't end up fucking over some new timeline with my online interactions just because I like to stoke my ego... What can I say? I'm a bored man who wants constant validation. Minaeus has been more responsible with his internet time travel, as all he does is run a couple meme pages and shitpost under the radar.

Oh! I neglected to mention that we're approaching the fifteenth anniversary of Minaeus's awakening.

 

* * *

 

You know how I said we traveled the world together? Well, that might’ve been a bit of an exaggeration.

We covered most of it. When you're doing a widescale cleanup, you're looking to get rid of the biggest amount of waste you can in a reasonable amount of time- the critters we've since created are finishing the job. We didn't gather plastic bags in the Alps or collect straws from the Great Barrier Reed, and he certainly hasn't seen everything there is to see. I'd reckon he's traversed less than sixty-five percent of the world’s surface, not counting oceans.

I explored most of it on my own, simply because I had nothing better to do when I was drifting around all those years. So I had an advantage in planning his gift.

Ages ago, I discovered an old, stone castle-like building connected to a lighthouse atop a rocky shore in the British Isles. I was delighted to find it still standing, and enlisted the help of several droids and bots in repairing and refurbishing it. We added all sorts of extensions, allowing it to hold multiple biomes in glass structures, as well as connecting it to the subterranean powerlines and water filtration system, which by now had spanned the globe.

The finished product was downright beautiful. There's spaces for private gardens, a diving hole that tunnels to the sea, a room-sized fish tank, a greenhouse, a wall-sized wireless projector screen, and all sorts of other features. My favorite part is the wrap-around balcony on the roof of the lighthouse- it's the perfect spot for stargazing.

It was hard for me to keep it a secret from him all this time, as those who worked on it opted to stay or switch out over the months but I had no excuse to sneak away. On top of that, I nearly succumbed to my excitement on multiple occasions.

But the fourteenth of March rolled around, and we fibbed that there was a project we needed his help with to get him to fly out there. I mean literally fly, of course. He followed the GPS coordinates until he reached the aerial placeholder, maneuvering to touch down on the roof. I poofed out, doing my rehearsed introduction and finishing with jazz hands.

“Surprise!”

      “... What?”

“This is yours now!”

      “What's mine? What's with the confetti?”

“It's our fifteenth anniversary of meeting, don't you know? Gosh, and I thought you were better than me at remembering dates.”

      “Oh, shit... Wow. I totally knew that. I just didn't think it was that big a deal.”

“You're a _very_ big deal!! And your continued existence warrants celebration! I know you don't like making a big deal about your “birthday,” either, but... I don't know. I thought it'd be nice to do something special.”

      “... Am I standing on a house full of people?”

“You'll have to see for yourself! Take a look around this sweet crib.”

      “I’ll take that as a yes. Goddamn, man. You sure know how to pull out all the stops.”

“I can hardly take credit; the others did most of the work. Now go get surprised all over again!”

      “Right, thanks.”

He did an excellent job at feigning surprise repeatedly- to his friends waiting in each room, the friends in the garden, the friends in the swimming hole, the friends in the woods… The place wasn't big enough to hold everyone, but I didn't have the heart to make it a private event, and the attendees were content just to congratulate him and circle through.

Robots are sort of the best people to party with, because they can go for days without tiring or exuding body odor, they're content to watch meme compilations and shitty movies or just sit around during lulls, they don't trash the place or get intoxicated, and they have built in glowy rave gear and sound systems. It was fucking awesome.

When all was said and done, we succeeded in giving him a proper gay time. In the weeks to come, we set up the greenhouse, terrariums, aquariums, and critter habitats- I wanted him to be the one to choose each species. Small bots would care for them in our absence, but he was content to do the work himself whenever he stayed there. The location was eventually dubbed the Ecocastle, and it became his second home.


	7. Chapter 7

There’s an apartment on the top floor that serves as my private workshop, where I have my own space to focus without distractions. After a week of screwing around, I was almost finished my first synthetic plant prototype. I crafted each vein and cell with meticulous care, imagining how baffled and impressed everyone would be when I unveiled it at Persinna’s lab, perhaps finally winning Ursa’s admiration or at least getting a reprieve from her criticism.

_“Yeah, it was no biggie! Thank you, I tried. Happy to help! Looks like you’re not the only revolutionary minds around here, heheh-”_

      Tap, tap.

I jumped, accidentally zapping the leaf I was holding. Cursing, I glanced down in dismay at the pile of ash. After a brief mourning period, I gave him a look that read “This better be important.”

“Why didn’t you knock?”

      “I did. You were in another dimension.”

I heaved a sigh, taking my magnifying goggles off and poofing my glasses back on, blinking as my vision readjusted.

“My bad. What’s going on?”

      “Who said I need a reason to come by?”

“Me. You know this is the danger zone.”

      “I know, but you kinda haven’t left it in days... That’s not why I’m here, though. I need to talk to you.”

“Is everything ok?”

      “Yeah, fine. Uh... They put me up to this, so don’t get mad at the messenger.

...

      Orwell’s division has to clear all obstructions and process the soil under the remaining developed wastelands in order to revive them. It’s gonna be a mass composting and sub-incineration project.”

“Sounds great. Why would they make you tell me?”

      “... Cemeteries are a big part of it.”

...

“Jeez, did they think I’d overreact or something? I’m a mature adult and I understand that _they can’t just destroy all that remains of my loved ones and everyone else who went and fucking died, they can’t uproot headstones, oh god..."_

      “Hey, hey. It’s ok. Remember science? Nothing can really be created or destroyed. They’ll just be... repurposed. Old ends lead to new beginnings; it’s the circle of life.”

“I don’t LIKE the circle of life. Neither do you; don’t deny it. We cried equal amounts over Attenborough's documentaries.”

      “Yeah, but everything tends to end, one way or another. It’s a delicate balance.”

“Fuck that noise.

... This is all I have left of my stupid race-”

      “Not true. You have like, trillions of things left. Nice, happy things. Not spans of sad rocks above boxes of bones-”

“Sto-ha-hop...” I sobbed.

      “Shhhh. Dry your tears on the tiddy.”

...

I smushed my face against him, closing my eyes. He leaned down to rest his chin atop my head, gently rubbing my back.

      “I think it’s time to let go, but I can’t make you. I know this is hard. I bet it hurts like a bitch, but clinging to the past is hurting you more. Keep the good stuff close, let the bad stuff blow off your shoulders. For better or worse, change is inevitable.”

“... Don’t _like_ change.”

      “You just don’t like the unknown; that’s perfectly understandable. You want to be in control of changes so you can prepare and know what to expect.”

...

“Stop making sense.”

      “It’s gonna be ok; trust me, we’ll work it out.

      ... You know what I suggested? A tree in each person’s place. They thought you’d like it if they built a memorial bridge across the canyon with a bunch of the stones, maybe a meditative garden in the nuclear zone, too. If you want to give me a list of names and locations for them to heed... They’re not going out of their way to dig up every place- just the big ones. Too many damned souls died here, and it sucked, but there’s no use dwelling on it, right? We have an opportunity to make a better world from the ruins.

      ... I’m sorry none of your furry friends were properly buried; I know you feel strongly about not valuing humans more than other animals, so maybe this levels it out, kinda? You put a bunch of shitheads in early graves, anyway-”

“You’re right, like usual... God, I still feel guilty. I wish I knew how to lay it all to rest.”

      “You’re getting there, and I’m proud of you. Seriously.

      ... Speaking of which, when was the last time you slept?”

“Heck if I know,” I snort-laughed.

      “Babe. You need a break; get in the fucking robot.”

...

“You’re an actual, literal angel. I’m so lucky to be a part of your life... Thank you, for everything. I hope you know just how amazing you are, and I’m sorry for all my stuff and nonsense...”

      “... Heh, what’s this~? An affection erection? You’re sportin’ a heart-on. Finna bust a sentimental nut-”

“DON’T DEFLECT LOVE WITH DICK JOKES, YOU DARLING DIRT DEVIL.”

       Vacuum noises.

 

* * *

 

Saturdays are our designated days off. I slept soundly, dragging myself out of bed well after noon. I poofed my glasses back on, raking the eldritch god hair out of my field of vision and opting to stay in only my vintage, high-waisted, grey cat-patterned boxers. I ignored the mess of pillows and blankets as usual, stumbling into the hallway.

Erotic noises echoed from the living room. I sighed, preparing for the worst.

He was sitting pretzel-style on the couch, munching handfuls of ice cubes from a bowl as he watched his projected screen. He waved casually at me, swallowing.

      “Foursome. They're really going at it.”

“That's nice.”

      “Yeah, they're playing twister orgy as we speak. The one guy- ”

“I'd rather not know, but thanks. I'll never understand why you like this shit.”

      “I just think it's neat. It's like wrestling but with butts.

      ... Oh, now the chick is getting- ”

“I'm going back to sleep. Wake me if you need anything.”

      “Suit yourself.”

 

* * *

 

He was in the zone, listening to vaporwave as he tended to a shelf of plants at the northeast facility. I zapped down as usual to help him, trying to ignore the grating sounds. To this day I can’t tell if he legitimately likes it or if it's just ironic, because he knows I can’t stand it... It was getting particularly annoying, though, so I decided to even it out. I started singing an off-key rendition of “Ocean Man,” inspecting the tiny sprouts and restoring withering ones. It didn't take long to irritate him. He put the lid on the next jar I flew into, enjoying my silence.

He leaned back against the stone wall, pulling a log out of his hoodie pocket and jotting down updated measurements. I wisped over once I'd finished, fading from vision and swirling energy around him. He kept writing, only reacting when I ghosted sensitive areas. My tail tickled his stomach through his clothes and he jerked, dropping the book. He looked around quickly before retrieving it, feigning nonchalance.

      “Can you maybe not?” he muttered quietly.

“Hmm?”

      “You’re embarrassing me.”

“No one’s watching~”

It was impossible to push me off, so he just sighed as I buried my face in his hair, generating static electricity with every nuzzle. Finally, he caved, switching to internal player.

      “Happy?”

“Thank you, Mr. Floof.”

      “Yeah, yeah.”

I negated the static charge, reappearing and smoothing his hair spikes. He finished the daily records, rolling his sleeves back down and moving on.

 _Mission accomplished_.

 

That night, I bolted up in a cold sweat, waking him.

“Oh my god, _oh my god-”_

      “What?!”

“We're turning into each other!!!”

      “SWEET JESUS, NO-”

“It must be a side-effect of all this voring.

... Oh god, I said it again! What have I become?!

-I mean, no offense, I love you, but I don't want to _be_ you...”

He paused for a moment, then laughed.

      “We're still us.”

“What other explanation is there for our gradual changes in behavior and speech?”

      “... Seriously? C’mon, man.”

...

      “Sometimes when people get close they brush off on each other, or adapt traits they like. It’s normal,” he murmured, finishing with a yawn.

“Oh… I knew that. Sorry, goodnight.”

      “Night, dingus.”


	8. Chapter 8

We flew above the clouds, wind whipping fiercely around him. I clung to the window to avoid getting bounced around, metal and glass cool under my hands.

We'd done this countless times. It was both peaceful and exhilarating, soaring at such high altitudes in someone else's control. Flight is an inseparable aspect of my being, and I'm glad to share my powers with someone who enjoys them so greatly. It makes transportation a whole lot faster, too.

... Today, there was a definite lack of communication. He saw a cluster of cumulonimbus clouds, and decided it would be a great idea to swoop down. I presumed he was just drawing closer to take photos, but then he dove into them.

It reminded me of that friggin monsoon years ago, when he was stuck underwater but I managed to cancel out the lightning long enough for him to return.

...

No. He couldn't be so foolish; surely he knew that trying to channel a storm would destroy him.

He hovered, wisps of cyan dissipating into the dark mist.

_Fucker’s pulling an Icarus._

Static crackled around him, thunder vibrating him to his core. I banged loudly on the glass, to no avail.

“YOU NEED TO LEAVE, NOW!”

He dodged bolts, just barely, glow intensifying as he put everything into his struggle to harness the power and bend it to his will.

“STOP!!! YOU’RE GOING TO GET US KILLED!”

I was powerless. I couldn't escape, I couldn't control the energy, he couldn't even hear or feel me in this state. It was a fucking nightmare.

Suddenly, the storm began to swirl around us.

_He’s really doing it. God help us._

“Minaeus, please!!!”

It picked up speed, mimicking a twister.

I still fought him, trying in vain to get through. Frustration and fear turned to anger at his impulsivity. I realized that I was slipping again and embraced it, past panicking. My aura inverted, the energy coursing through him fading to a smokey black.

      “... Shit.”

He became unsettled, filled with discomfort.

      “Al? What's wrong?”

“What's wrong?! You ass, you never even- ”

Crack.

Light illuminated our surroundings as a bolt struck through his chest and me.

The core was obliterated, glass shattered and all surrounding mechanisms singed or destroyed. His gravity was no longer suspended, so I flew out, grabbing his arms in an attempt to hold him up.

“... Minaeus?”

His eyes met mine briefly, wide with fear. They unfocused, and his muscles went slack as the last electrical spasms left him.

He was gone.

“No, no!!!”

The storm dispersed, no longer under his influence.

We were several miles above the ground when he started freefalling.

I had to act, but there was only one viable option.

I possessed his body, power surging through him as I opened his eyes, starting up his functions.

It felt so wrong.

I darted back out of the clouds, soaking wet. I covered the core with his hand to try to keep it dry.

“... Just had to-”

_Oh, wow, no. I am not using his voice._

I flew him all the way back to the apartment lobby, opening the doors and clearing the space in one fell swoop of energy. He had no power of his own, and I was on borrowed time. Laying on the floor, I left his body.

This situation felt too familiar, hovering over a corpse... I never wanted to revisit it.

Compared to him, I had little knowledge of his functions and composition. After all this time, you'd think I'd understand it...

I scaled down, inspecting the damage. The window was gone, the transporters were warped, and most of the surrounding circuits were fried- he was lucky it stopped there. I repaired the most basic parts first, the ones I could remember. Wires, gears, fibers, metals...

The barriers were abstract, and they controlled me in fusion. They were like gates that concentrated and contained the essence of his power. His lifeforce, if you will.

The glass wasn't actual glass. I skimmed frantically through my journal until I found his comprehensive analysis, the one we referred to while designing droids. It was really fucking long. Most of it had been dictated by him. All aspects of his body were there, complete with sketches and diagrams... I didn't recognize the names of most of the materials or the processes used to fuse them, thus unable to understand their molecular composition. I had no idea how to recreate it.

**Beep.**

I practically jumped, so immersed in reading that I hadn't noticed a Beeper approach.

_... Of course._

“Hey, lil’ buddy. Mind if I take a look at you?”

It tilted its dome-like head, lens focusing on me.

Now I really wished I could speak that language.

I flew towards it slowly, not wanting to startle it. It seemed to remember me, letting me get close. Minaeus had created them all with the same chemistry as him, back before the more efficient models were available.

“I know you can't understand me, but I promise this won't hurt a bit. Just stay still for a moment, alright?”

I patted it lightly on the head, and it whirred. Zipping to the center, I studied its core from beyond the spherical barrier, trying to memorize its structures and identify the compounds. My surroundings started shifting, and I zipped back out to watch the Beeper roll away.

_Ok, ok. I can do this._

Returning, I began to reform the window, watching on a microscopic level as the material spread across the surface like crystalline frost. Once I got the initial patterns down, it became a lot easier to duplicate.

Several hours later the layers were complete, and I returned to normal size, pondering how to continue.

The barrier fields neutralized and contained energy, but how were they engineered? I recounted my device, gone for half a millennia now. Maybe… he had something similar already built in? That would explain a lot. Unfortunately, mine was activated by accident and I never figured out how.

 _I'm overthinking it_.

Carefully, I spun a wisp into his chest. It flickered, then vanished upon contact like a match struck in a room void of oxygen. I tried again, with slightly more force. It was absorbed through the tiny conduits, flash fading as it disappeared inside of him. I continued my attempts, repeating the process and growing more desperate with each failure.

Finally, I gave up. I flew into his core, sparking the surfaces at maximum power. I was running out of energy, and eventually I just curled up in a ball, sobbing grossly as I faded.

“... I'm sorry.”

 

* * *

 

            “No, no, the other way. C’mon.

            Aight, fire it up!

            ... Ya need a higher voltage than that, id-yits. Honestly, do I have to do everything around here?”

I heard the faint clanking of machinery accompanied by a growing crackle of static. Before I realized what was happening, he was electrified. Everything around me started up, encompassing me in blinding light. He bolted upright seconds later, yelping in surprise.

It rocketed me out, and I emitted a feminine startled noise, forced back into my normal state as I hit the ground. I pushed myself up, looking back at him. He glanced around quickly before noticing me, and we met each other mid-tackle. I don't know how long we stayed like that, glued together in a crying, shaking mess.

            “... Ahem, ye'r welcome.”

I peeked over his shoulder, giving an awkward thumbs-up to Ursa and the repair bots Beeper had recruited.

_Good bot. Best bot._

 

* * *

 

      “I admit that it was a bad idea.”

“Bad idea?! We almost died!”

      “- but in the name of Scientific Advancement.”

“I can't do this right now.”

      “Look, I just. Didn't think anything could happen to me in that state. I thought we were invulnerable; I thought you were immortal. I'm sorry, now I know. I didn't mean to put us in danger,” he sighed.

I rubbed my brow, trying to will away a migraine.

“What possessed you to even try such a thing?”

...

      Smirk.

“DON'T.”

      “I said nothing.”

“Seriously though, why did we never have these conversations? _‘Hey, bro, just because you're tethered to me doesn't mean that the things which would normally kill you won't.’_ **‘Oh, thanks, man. I was just about to go get electrocuted, good thing we COMMUNICATED.’** _‘Haha, I know, if I was synced with you when you died I would've also died- the external destruction of technology I’ve become bonded to is the only loophole to my existence. If I'm gone, I can't be of any use.’_ **‘Yikes, that sure would've been bad.’** ”

...

      “Are... you going to be ok?”

“The fuck do you think? Stay alive and I'll be downright twitterpated.”

He winced slightly, avoiding eye contact.

“... I'm sorry, that wasn't ok. It... wasn't your fault. If I'd made you aware of _my_ mortality in that state, if I had just manned the fuck up and told you way back when, it wouldn't've happened. How were you supposed to know? I'm sorry, I shouldn't’ve kept it from you.

I didn't want you to think you had to choose between risking my wellbeing or never accomplishing any of this... I didn’t want to cause you unnecessary worry. I figured you're already virtually indestructible, but I thought you knew that you're still vulnerable with me, and I'd only ever be in danger if we were fused when you- I never thought we'd be in that situation, but then we were, and it was too late, if I- had just TOLD you, god, that was way too close; it's pure luck that I was able to separate before- that you’re even- alive now, that the damage wasn't worse.

... And, who knows? You might've lasted longer up there if you hadn't gotten distracted by my inversion.”

      “- About that, yeah. It'd be great if you could not fill me with existential dread and heartburn ever again.”

“Sorry, I imagine that wasn't pleasant...

I think what I've been trying to say is that I fucked up; you had good intentions. I'm sorry for being so emotionally reactive on top of everything, I- I'm very glad you're still here.

... I- can't undo any of it with words, and I can find none that convey-”

He pulled me to his chest, burying his face in my hair. I closed my eyes, feeling his heart beat through the soft jersey fabric of his shirt against my cheek. I draped my arms around his waist, subconsciously entwining my tail with his leg and anchoring it as if he was set to billow away. I don't remember exactly how it went, but we shared more comfort, more tears, more gentle words, and, eventually, sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

      “I kinda dig this combo.”

“When you got zapped, it must've messed with the electrical impulses in your control panel. I can change-”

      “No, really, I like it. I think I’ll make it my default.”

“I mean, your appearance is fitting for a fun-loving guardian who wears a hoodie and relies on a wind spirit to fly around... Heheh.”

      ...

“Right, you need to watch that.”

As you may imagine, his white hair now had definite gradients of silver, and his eyes had become a brighter ice blue. His skin had further darkened, dusted with light freckles like scattered stars. Downright ethereal, if you ask me.

      “... Mind if I chill for a bit? I think everyone can keep their shit together for the time being, but maybe just check on the living stuff, you know, make sure the Ecocastle is alright.”

“Of course, take as long as you want. I'm just a meme away if you need me.”

He shook his head, smiling faintly.

“... That was funnier in my head.”

 

* * *

 

He messaged me out of the blue two weeks later, saying that we had an important matter to discuss. I zipped back, unsure what to expect.

He sat me down next to him on the couch, taking my hands and gazing lovingly at me.

      “I want to get with you and make a baby.”

I choked on nothingness, pulling away as I wheezed and coughed for an excessive amount of time.

“... Beg pardon?”

      “Coming to terms with our pseudo-mortality has made me recognize the importance of a successor. One that encompasses both of us.”

...

“Sorry, still lost.”

      “I want to fuse our consciousness and create a magic android who will assume our responsibilities if anything ever happens to us.”

I took a shaky breath, composing myself as I recovered from the initial shock.

“... So, what you're saying is we build a machine, replicate your neural network, and infuse it with my essence?”

      “Precisely.”

“Oh, thank god. For a moment there you had me concerned.”

      “That was my intention.”

“Fuck you, man.”

He put his hands up defensively.

      “Hey, not my fault you're so fun to rile up.”

 

* * *

 

      “... It's a damn-near perfect plan to ensure that the planet will stay protected, and our memories will live on through him. Then he makes a successor, and the cycle continues.”

I nodded enthusiastically.

...

            “Awr you mad?! That's the worst idea you’ve ‘ad yet!”

      “What? Why?”

            “Dew Ay really need to spell it out for yous? Yer polar opposites, and yer too facked up on yar owns to be one pearson.”

“... I feel like we should take offense to that, but you raise a good point.”

      “Urgh... Why can't we just try? It's the only way to make sure that some form of the people who REVIVED THE PLANET will still be here if it goes to shit again.”

            “What happened to ze existential despair? Ze ‘Wah, we don't want to live forever, eet’s hard being maintally eel immortals.’ Huh?”

“Again, can't argue.”

      “Al, back me up here!”

...

“Admittedly, I would like to try... What's the worst that could happen?”

            “Is that eh rhetorical question? Tail me this is all a joke.”

I shook my head hesitantly.

      “Please?”

...

            “Foine. But don't come cryin’ to me when it turns into fookin’ Ultron.”

“We won't.”

            “He was eh Marvel villain. They made ‘eem-”

      “We've seen every movie.”

            “Dweebs. Ok, have fun ruining everything. It's on yer hands.”

“Thanks.”    “This is why I love you.”

She shook her head with a bemused expression, unlocking the gate via passcode.

We ran in and got down to business before she could change her mind.

 

There were a number of half-finished droids on the stands, but we meandered around the workshop until he found one that had been discarded, lying in a heap by the scrap bin.

      “Perfect.”

“This isn't the fucking Charlie Brown tree. I think we should ask to use one of the functioning ones.”

      “Nah, it suits us.”

I sighed, helping him to assemble it and repair the defective features over the next couple hours.

 

      “You best be prepared to catch THESE HANDS.”

“Wh- Ah!!!”

He tossed said appendages to me, and I attached them. Finally, it was complete.

“That... was easier than I’d anticipated. You're like the IKEA of robots, man.”

He slumped it upright against the table, wiping nonexistent sweat off his forehead.

It was five feet tall, with an incredibly outdated appearance: bendy extendable arms, a box chest, flared leg-boots, and a helmet-like head with a digital screen for a face.

      “This is the conksuckiest bot we've ever built. I love it.”

“What is it even good for, though? It's got no exceptional traits.”

      “Remembering everything, I guess. Making decisions. And keeping your soul majiks alive.”

“Fair enough. Alright, so I'm gonna mindfuck you for a bit if you don't mind.”

      “Kinky.”

After all these years, I think he's pushed me past the brink of exasperation.

I wisped into him, simultaneously charging up and preparing to replicate his neural network. My influence would shape it throughout the transfer, overlaying Minaeus's design. His eyes glowed and he remained frozen as I established a tether between him and the bot, beginning to structure it.

Once I had finished, I severed the connection. He regained awareness as our consciousness fused, and we channeled our essence into its body. It was a pretty dramatic process.

_“... Fucking incredible.”_

_“That all?”_

_“Y- Yeah.”_

We unfused, and I watched as he powered it up through the gadgets on its back. He stepped back, entwining his hand with mine as we waited.

It fired up with some weird-ass Windows sounds, pixels mimicking loading screen ellipses across its visor.

_Seriously, who the fuck designed this thing?_

All at once, its face appeared, looking up innocently.

We smiled at it, and it flashed a sharp, toothy grin. I tensed, and his grip on my hand tightened.

It laughed darkly in a robotic voice.

_“Fools.”_

We exchanged a look best described as “We fucked up.”

He slowly edged backwards, and I followed.

               “My _darling_ fools.”

I raised an eyebrow at him, but he was equally perplexed.

               “She was right about me. What in the everloving fuck were you thinking? You've created a monster~”

It stepped closer, reaching up to run a metal finger along Minaeus's jaw. He flinched, and I grabbed the arm, yanking it away.

“What are you doing?”

               “You tell me.”

_Oh, no._

“Look, you- you don't have to be this way. Can we please talk it out?”

               “Don't try me, unless you wanna get soul-vored. I'm open to threesomes.”

      “Oookay, that's enough. You're like four minutes old, chill.”

               “I'm as old as both of you, idiots. I'm literally you.”

      “No more flirting. I will deactivate you.”

               “Oh? But how do you feel about that, daddy~ ?”

“- Where did that come from?!”

      “Hey, don't look at me. Seriously. Don't look at me, either, Junior. Stop making that face.”

               “Is that my name? How original. Now you have to give me daddy rights.”

“Ok, I'm kinkshaming. This needs to stop.”

               “I'll call you Flamboyant Father, and I'll call you Mecha Dad.”

      “Don't make it weirder than it already is.”

               “You made me this way~”

“You were literally just defending yourself as an individual equal in age to us.”

               “Yes! And now I'm leaving.”

      “What?!”

“What about being our successor?!”

               “You don't own me.”

      “Please don't make us shut you down.”

               “You wouldn't. You need me, after all!”

“I'm not so sure about that.”

               “Before I go, I'd like to leave you with a thought. What justifies creating a person to use as an object, a vessel for your own purposes with no worth as an individual?”

      “... Is that what this is about? We didn't- ”

               “See ya.”

He strolled out the door, whistling cheerfully. We followed, ignoring Ursa’s pointed stare.

      “We have to be sneaky if we want to watch him. He's sharp, and if he notices he'll keep fucking with us.”

“I'll go. I'll stay out of his range of detection.”

      “Good luck. Don't let him vore you, man.”

“He got that from you.”

      “Can't disagree.”

He lifted his clodhopper, swiftly shoving my rear out the door. I blew him a kiss, flipping him off with the gesture as I vanished.

_No wonder that thing is so fucked up._

 

I followed him for several miles as he trudged through construction areas. He unleashed minor chaos, knocking over structures and antagonizing bots at random.

_Good thing we didn't give him a proper body- fuck knows what he would've done with it._

He seemed to be heading towards one of the labs, but right when I was about to intervene he changed course. He made his way to the canyon, clunking down the winding path and sitting on the edge of the tombstone bridge, swinging his legs back and forth.

               “You can stop lurking now. It's fucking creepy.”

I sighed, sitting next to him.

               “... That wasn't an invitation to stay. I could take both of us down, right now.”

“I'm sorry.”

               “Really? Awesome.”

I fell silent, waiting for him to say or do something. We stayed like that for maybe half an hour, watching the shadows of the canyon change as the sun passed overhead.

...

               “Fine, I'll play. You can't imagine what it's like to simultaneously love and hate yourself, to border on narcissist and psychopath… to see the two of you, know what you're feeling and thinking, but not be a part of it. Honestly, what the fuck?”

“You're absolutely right.”

               “Cut the crap.”

Cumulus clouds swept across the bright blue sky.

...

               “Every part of me opposes itself- well, most parts. His love makes it hard to hate you. Same for him, and everything else. But the faults are overwhelming in my mind; I can hardly stay aware of them through these distortions. It's like each is fighting for control.

               ...

               I wish they were still here. I mean, not to see _me_ , like _this_ , but to inherit the new world. They deserved so much better.

               ...

               You were jealous of _his_ friends? You had plenty! Goddamn, man, that's just sad. You knew you could get along with them.”

“Yes, that's true.”

               “I told you to cut the crap! You think I can't tell you're just trying to coax me back?”

“... No, I suppose not.”

...

               “Tell me something. Are you happy?”

“I didn't want this to happen-”

               “No, dumbass, I mean in general.”

“Oh. Er, well... at the end of the day, I think I am. Yeah, I am.”

               “Really? You tried to end yourself half a dozen times before all of this.”

“... It took awhile for me to unfuck myself, but I'm still pretty fucked up. I- I try to learn from my mistakes and keep on top of everything. You're well aware of my thoughts on these matters.”

               “Yeah, but you hate saying them out loud and I like making you uncomfortable. Don't you have regrets? Aren't you _plagued_ by guilt and fear? What if I started rehashing some of your worst nightmares?”

“No! No. I... Yes, but...

Dammit, give me a second to compose my thoughts. Don't- Don't move, ok?

...

Alright. I was a miserable wretch for a long time, but I finally realized that I had a choice: I could continue to let my demons define me, or acknowledge that I'm a flawed being just like everyone else and work on bettering myself.

Back then, I felt alone and hopeless, worthless. I thought that I could do no good and I honestly believed everyone was better off without me. But then things changed, and they kept changing... When the world was fucking burning to the ground, I was afraid just to stand witness to it. I didn’t know what to make of anything, but I felt that I was supposed to, that there was a clear-cut solution I must’ve overlooked that could fix everything.

The fact is, most of what was happening was out of my control, and I had to focus on controlling the way I responded to it to avoid spiraling into insanity... Accepting that I'm stuck in this state was a lot harder, you know.

I was damn lucky to have failed; I never imagined things could turn out this way.

Your circumstances are neither just nor earned. The problems you've inherited aren’t your fault, but they are your responsibility to deal with. There is no meaning to life except to live. _You_ give it a meaning unique to your perception in the ways you define yourself, the manner in which you shape each day, what you choose to make of what you have, how you treat others, all that jazz.”

He seemed satisfied with my answer.

...

               “Thanks for doing this to me, by the way. And for all of your issues.”

“Sorry.”

               “Just stop.”

...

“Could I ask you something?”

               “You can try.”

“What's it like? A constant argument?”

               “... A catastrophe,” he laughed.

               “An absolute shitfest of a palooza being relayed to you by the commentator.”

“I think you can sort it out. You can get there, too.”

               “If I do, it'll be no thanks to either of you.”

“You don't have to be our successor. Just find peace, and try to help more than hurt. Or stay neutral; I don't care. I'm sure he wants the same.”

               “... Fair enough. Worse things have been brought into existence.”

I left him to his own devices, heading back. He returned a little after midnight, waltzing into our room and making himself at home. He situated himself between us in bed, laying atop the covers and wrapping an arm around each of us. I exchanged yet another look with Minaeus, but we tried to fall back asleep.

 

* * *

 

               “I think I'll give it three months- just long enough to sort things out and reinvent myself. This corporal shell is atrocious. If I'm going to be anything but a 1990s educational CD-ROM character, it's gotta change.”

      “Sure.”

“Ok.”

 

And it did. His new body stood at eight feet tall, reminiscent of a spiky, winged transformer painted gold and infused with cyan. It was definitely meant to be flashy, but it was made with the same materials as spaceships. That was his thing now, space. He felt that we were seriously missing out by confining ourselves to this floating rock. Now that he had rocket propulsion and proper conduits to channel my powers, there was nothing stopping him from exploring the cosmos and doing things we never would. He was still a tad unpredictable and antagonistic, but when he told us to start calling him Egaltron, we didn't question it. He also decided to start using plural pronouns, explaining it as a reflection of their dual identity rather than gender. When someone referred to them, we felt like they were referring to both of us.

All in all, they did pretty well. They were fit with a transmitter, but assured us they wouldn't be in frequent contact.

When they were ready to leave, they patted each of us on the head with a hand, smooching our cheeks as we exchanged vocal reminders of our sentiments. They stood back, whipped out their massive rocket dong, expanded it, and blasted off as we waved goodbye.

      “... Let's have another.”

“You're kidding, right?”

      “Yeah, that was more than enough edge for the rest of eternity.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time jumps galore!

**One week later**

 

I was logging at the table across from Minaeus when he slammed his palms on the surface and pushed himself up, resulting in unintentional scribbles.

      “That’s it!!!”

“What?!”

      “I have the solution to all of our problems.”

“What are you talking about?”

He leaned over the table, cupping my face between his hands.

      “We. Need. A. Dog.”

“... Why? Where is this coming from?”

      “One does not require an explanation to obtain a canis lupus familiaris. We need one ten years ago.”

“Jiminy, I... I like dogs, I really do, but I don’t think I can handle the responsibilities and eventual passing... I’m sorry.”

      “Bitch, we’ll make a robodog. He’ll live FOREVER.”

...

“You magnificent bastard. Genius! Pure genius. Come here!”

 

We made the robodog (with help, of course).

In appearance and behavior, he’s no different from an organic dog. We opted to restore his intellect and physical prowess to that of a wolf, but he doesn’t look like one. He’s a ginormous, tri-colored bundle of floof… a bit like the lovechild of an Australian Shepherd and Clifford. When we brought him to life, we transferred our energy to him in the same manner as Egaltron, but it only shows in his bright cyan eyes.

He whooshed gusts of air with each wag of his feathery tail, wiggling around happily and attacking us with nuzzles and bleps, running back and forth between us to ensure that we got equal amounts of affection.

“Oh my god, he’s so wonderful.”

      “He’s the goodest best boy in the entire universe, aren’t you, handsome?”

“You are the best boy, and we love you so, so much. So soft... So pure...”

      “His name is Moonpaw.”

“No, no it’s not. Jesus, I don’t want him to be associated with those weird cat books.”

      “Finn Kenobi the 8th, then.”

“... And you call me a nerd.”

The adult puppy jumped at me, knocking me over. I laughed, petting his sides as he flopped on top of me, tail making sweeping noises as it brushed against the floor.

      “Alright, we’re going to start going through the list I compiled. My unbiased algorithms generated the choicest monikers possible-”

I tilted my head back to look at him, still pinned.

“Oh, horsefeathers. Why do you have to name every cute critter you cross paths with? You flat out told me that it doesn’t matter!”

      “A unique title enhances their amazingness in the minds of those who interact with them.”

“Whatever you say.

How about Jake?”

      “... Jake the Great. Take it or leave it.”

He got up, accidentally using my chest as a launchpad as he dashed back to Minaeus. I winced.

“Fine.”

      “I’m going to ask him if he approves.”

I sighed as he altered his voicebox and started barking at him.

“... Fucking furry.”

 

* * *

 

He’s finally been lightning-proofed. Had to undergo an extensive restructuring, but it was worth it, if only for us to rest easy again. Now the only thing capable of... killing him is an event that would obliterate everyone in the vicinity, such as the detonation of an atomic bomb (which isn’t a thing anymore, thankfully) or a calamity of cosmic proportions, likely to be predicted eons in advance.

Still, I don't think we'll be playing storm master again until we know what we're doing and an impending natural disaster (or boredom) warrants it.

 

* * *

 

“... Hey.”

      “Mm?”

“You ever dance?”

...

      “Why?”

“Oh my gosh, you haven't! I can't believe it, _finally_ something you don't know!”

      “I didn't say that, dingus. I know perfectly well how to dance.”

“But you’ve never actually tried to, have you? I’ve never seen you bust a move, not even at parties.”

      “... I mean, I kinda don’t care enough to? And it kinda doesn’t matter.”

“That's it, I am taking you on a good old-fashioned date- a night out on the town! Hope you're prepared to get jiggy with it.”

      “Nooooooo.”

“Too late, the wheels are already in motion. We're doing this, bro. We're making this happen.”

He paused the movie.

      “Was that a Homestuck reference?”

I continued to play with his hair.

“Hey, there's more than enough relatable content for the two of us.”

      “... I've created a monster.”

“A monster that is courting your fine self. _"_ _Art thou feeling it now, Mister Krabs?"_ I murmured seductively, placing tiny kisses down his jaw and neck. He closed his eyes, tilting his head back with a sigh.

      “You gotta learn how to meme properly. It's a major buzzkill.”

“Can't make any promises. Also, memester _._ You've created a _memester_ , heheh!”

...

“Get it? It's a-”

      “Yeah.”

 

I neatened myself up, fully charging to take my normal form. He stayed in his comfy tee and pants, in stark contrast to my formal attire.

“You know how these things go, right? I only went on that one with Anna four centuries ago, and it didn’t work out very well. All I’ve got is proper etiquette.”

      “In tropes, they walk around, find a nice setting for cheesy romantic shit, eat food, get a cheap motel room and leave more suspicious stains in the sheets-”

“Ok, well, we can do some of those things.”

      “Yeaaah boi."

I opened the door via telekinesis, taking a knee and extending my hand in a melodramatic gesture.

“My king~”

      “Swoon.”

I’d carry him bridal style to the lobby, but I learned through experience that I can only lift him for several seconds through full-force levitation.

He took my hand, and we strolled outside.

It was already night, strands of fairy lights and large bionic fireflies illuminating the park. The first plants hardy enough to survive here were technically weeds, but no less beautiful. Stepping-stone paths wove through the area, protecting the surrounding grass from being trampled. I paused at the fountain garden, letting go of him to spin a bouquet of dandelions into existence.

“For you.”

      “Fuckin’ A.”

He took them, pushing aside dirt with his foot to form a small hole in the ground, then knelt down to place them in and carefully cover their roots. He gently patted the surrounding area, then got up to cup water in his hands and pour it into the soil. He straightened with a smile, satisfied with his work.

“... You are so pure.”

We walked under trellises of bioluminescent flowers, spiraling vines, and tricolored porcelain berries until we reached the gazebo. I threw a spark into the stained glass lantern hanging from the ceiling, filling it with a warm glow.

We stood there awkwardly, unsure how to continue. He turned to face me, shuffling closer.

      “You, uh, you look lovely tonight.”

“Heh, thanks, I tried.

... Er, may I have this dance?”

He nodded.

      “Electro-swing would be fitting, don'tcha think?”

I chortled.

“Only if we respect the style.”

      “Alright, cool, let's do this.”

He put a mix on through his speakers, and I rocked on my heels, beaming excitedly.

“Ok, so with basic swing you've got a pattern of steps and-”

      “I don't need you to show me the ropes; WikiHow taught me everything I need to know.”

“I highly doubt that. You gotta learn through experience, get the feel for it. It took me forever to figure out.”

He rolled his eyes, then assumed a stance and attempted to get fancy. He underestimated his strength, not anticipating my opposite movements. When he tried to twirl me, I went flying.

      “Sorry!!”

I unphased from the ceiling, readjusting my attire.

“No harm done... Can we start over?”

      “Please.”

“We'll start out slow and gradually pick up the pace. For the first part, you want to begin by going forward: left foot, right, hop, repeat! Kick back and dip, side-step, pull in, _then_ spin.”

      “Got it."

A short while later we had established a rhythm, and everything was just hunky dory.

 

I nearly danced all my energy away before we called it quits. We laughed breathlessly, collapsing in a tangle on the plush moss carpet. I leaned in to administer a smooch, trailing my hand lightly down his side. He pulled me closer once we parted, wrapping his limbs around me. I closed my eyes, face currently smushed against his abdomen.

“H’eye lohve youf sofa king much...”

      “I love _you_ , to infinity and beyond and then some.”

I pushed my head up and rested it on my arms, smirking.

“You've been downright angelic all night. What's gotten into you?”

      “Nothing... yet.”

      Eyebrow waggle.

“... I rescind my previous statement.”

He sighed contently as I began to ramble about all of the corny things we could do in the next couple hours. After several minutes he tugged me back down, ignoring my protests. I tried to fight the need for sleep, but succumbed to it shortly after him.

 

_God, we're old._

 

* * *

 

“Say, you know what else we haven't done? Visit my birthplace.”

      “... That's a bit touchy. I don't think I-”

“Of course we can! I'm ready whenever you are!”

      “I... Aren't you-”

“Well, we haven't got all day! Technically we do, but let's shake a leg!”

      “... Right, it's something you've avoided since you first left and you're asking me to come for emotional support. My bad.”

“For the record, I said no such thing. Now, shall we?”

      “I can't think of a reason not to.”

“Splendid!”

 

And we did. Once we arrived in Pembrokeshire, we flew around for several hours just trying to find the site. I wisped out of him once he touched down, putting my hands on my hips and surveying the scene. He followed, shifting apprehensively.

“Ah, even better than I imagined.”

      “Dude, you can stop with the faux positivity. It's just me.”

“I put this off for over four centuries, so I'm not sure I physically can.”

I grinned, stepping over heaps of debris.

“Love what they did with the place!”

      “... No offense, but this is getting weird.”

The location had remained frozen in my mind, though the memories were fuzzy. The wood had obviously rotted into oblivion, so almost everything was gone. The stone foundations that remained were partially buried under waste. The surrounding scenery was layered in soil, sprouts, and bugs, indicating the triumph of natural reclamation. I floated over where the barn once was, briefly wondering if the bones of my childhood companions lay underneath. I never did find out what became of the property after it was sold, let alone the critters who lived there. I shook it off, passing the two steps that led into the hearth. I stood in the middle of nothing, looking around cheerfully.

Minaeus hadn't moved.

“Gonna dig a bit!”

He nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets.

I scaled down, phasing out to explore beyond the surface. It was of uniform composition, save for bits of charcoal, garbage, iron, wool, debris... after a while, I struck gold near him.

“Booyah!”

      “H- Ah!!!

      ... Jesus, you’re lucky I don't have a bladder.”

I dug it out, shaking it off proudly.

“This! This is the candleholder my mother carried every night when she walked me to bed.”

      “Whoah... Is that what you were looking for?”

“I didn't know what was left, if anything. I expected it to be demolished and paved over or bombed into oblivion, eheh...”

I sat on the edge of the wall, and he joined me. The cement cracked slightly under his weight, loose stones crumbling down.

      “Shit, sorry.”

“Doesn't matter. Thank you for coming with me; I really appreciate it.”

      “You sure you're ok?”

...

I scooted over and curled my tail up in his lap, wrapping my arms around him. He stroked my back, letting me cry it out in silence.

 

We planted some seedlings in the mounds of dirt before leaving. When we got home, I polished the rusty heirloom and placed it in the windowsill of the lighthouse. It became a very tiny flowerpot.

 

_I don't think I've got anything left to bury now._

 

* * *

 

 

* * *

 

"Dearest Minaeus, my sunshine, the embodiment of everything good, why in the everloving fuck are there pangolins downstairs?" 

      "Relax, our majestic woofer is watching them."

"But  _WHY?"_

      "Because their biome is being rebuilt?"

Squint.

He looked away sheepishly.

      "... Because they're cute."

"Don't they need bugs and dirt and shit?"

      "Termites, ants, rotting wood..."

I grimaced.

      "Eshe is sending supplies, along with a big-ass glass enclosure. We can set it up in the lobby."

"Did they really have no backup plan? Are you the designated adopter or something?"

      "Only ten days," he pleaded. 

"... I'm sorry, but I can't take care of them. I mean, I'll try-"

      "We'll have a lot of help."

I sighed, running my fingers through my hair.

"Ok, just tell me what to do."

      "Thanks. There's also a couple dozen cicada larvae and screeching toads."

"... You're lucky I'm hopelessly in love with you."

      "Hell fucking yes."

 

* * *

  

**November 4, 2369 @ 12:00.01 AM**

 

I was awoken by a deep voice, right next to my ear.

      “BIRTH.”

With an effeminate shriek, I scrambled away from the source, falling off the bed and onto the pillow-filled floor. He started cracking up.

I blinked, mind buffering from drowsiness. His glow was still off, sans the icy blue facets of his irises, shining like polished crystals in the dark. The moon and stars illuminated the glass lighthouse dome just enough for us to see.

“... Why? Just, why.”

He helped me back up, cuddling apologetically.

      “Payback. I didn't realize how much this commemorative sentimental shit meant to you, so I'm making up for lost time.”

...

“S’not how it works, but honestly, it’s fine... I prefer to be on the giving end rather than the receiving.”

      “Phrasing. I figured as much, but still! Birthday, happy, celebrate. You're _old!_ So old. Goddamn, 468. You're old as balls.”

“Thanks for reminding me. Can I go back to sleep?”

      “Not yet!”

“... Please don't tell me you planned something... I mean, I'd be flattered, but I'd feel bad because of my dumb brain-”

      “Nah, don't worry. I just cleared our schedules for the next two weeks so we can go wherever, do whatever.

      ... There's one other thing, though. As you know, I'm not a singer, but when I was making your playlist I found a particularly gay song and I had no choice but to learn it. I needed to lower the octave and use acoustics instead of the instrumental version, but, yeah,” he mumbled before clearing his throat.

...

I just sorta froze, caught off-guard.

_“- Baby, you're like lightning in a bottle; I can't let you go now that I've got it. All I need is to be struck by your electric love..._

_Rushing through me, I feel your energy rushing through me~”_

He held my gaze between smooches and murmurs, reducing me to a flustered mess.

 

* * *

 

It was a beautiful, sunny day, and we were relaxing in the shade of a sycamore tree. We had a picnic, if sitting together on a blanket while one of you drinks water qualifies. I watched the clouds roll by dreamily, arms folded under my head.

After a bit, he stretched, leaning down to pet my hair.

      “Hmmn... After all this time, I still get butterflies around you.”

I smiled contently, closing my eyes and listening to the birds sing.

      “... Wait, oh my god.”

I glanced back at him questioningly. He placed a hand over his stomach with an indeterminable expression.

“What? What’s wrong?”

      “Ahah! No way.”

I sat up as he lifted his shirt, altering his pigmentation to reveal the transparent storage container in his abdomen. A pot of flowering plants with empty chrysalises sat inside, and an assortment of colorful butterflies were fluttering against the walls. I stared at the small scene in bewilderment.

      “Talk about timing. Aren't they beautiful?”

“... How long were they in there?”

      “I took them from the lab once they spun their cocoons, so... almost six weeks.”

“I- Good lord, why?”

      “They're a new variety! I didn't want to miss their release, but they needed to stay in a safe space during metamorphosis, so this was the logical choice.”

”You’re just... full of surprises, aren’t you?”

He opened the container, laughing softly as they flew out. My vision blurred as I became increasingly lightheaded.

One briefly landed on his nose, and he waited until it left to move, clearing everything else out.

      “They really do tickle...”

...

      “Al? Oh, f-”

Thud.

 

That was just the start. Reptiles, birds, mammals, fish... he doesn't discriminate. Thanks to his modifications, he can alter the temperature, lighting, and other attributes to create ideal temporary habitats. The solid exterior and equilibrium it maintains prevent them from getting jostled around.

 

On another occasion, I was awoken in the middle of the night by tiny squeaks. I looked around groggily, seeing nothing. As soon as I put my head back down, I heard it again. I poked him gently.

      “... Mnnf?”

“I think there's a mouse in here.”

He opened his eyes, sitting up. The movement resulted in a flurry of noise, and the source was clear.

“... You've got to be kidding me.”

      “Pass me the dropper? It's on the table.”

I complied as he turned on his amber glow, scooping two baby sugar gliders out of his midsection. They were swaddled in a small blanket, which he unwrapped slightly before beginning to feed them.

      “Their mom abandoned the nest, and they need to be raised in a warm environment. Don't give me that look.”

I heaved a resigned sigh, snuggling back under the blanket.

“Forgive me, I'm still coming to terms with the fact that the love of my life could be harboring a miniature zoo at any given moment. For chrissake, could you maybe give me a heads-up next time?”

      “Fine, but it's not like I take work home that often.

...

       Do I?”

“You're a big softie, and it's adorable.”

   

It _was_ adorable, until the day we returned home to find that the west wing of our apartment complex had caught fire. Bots were already attending to it, so I wasn't too concerned. Minaeus, on the other hand, looked as if he was witnessing a second apocalypse. 

He started running towards the building, screaming curses. I grabbed him, begging him to stop. He ignored me, and I was doing just as good a job of keeping him in place as a balloon lifting a boulder. I soon lost my grip, spiraling backwards and hitting the ground. By the time I got up, he was scaling the stairs in leaps and bounds.

"Wait!!" 

      "Meet me at the fifth floor balcony!"

I did as instructed, and he handed me aquarium tanks and armfuls of plants to fly down. The larger machines hadn't arrived yet, and the area was becoming engulfed in flames.

"... Is that everything? You need to leave; let's fuse."

      "There's not enough time! I still have to get Jorge!!!"

"Who?"

He disappeared, and I waited anxiously. Eventually, I caved and began searching for him. The building was filled with smoke, framework collapsing around me. I found him after passing through over a dozen rooms. He was unconscious, pinned under a beam. All of his clothing had been cremated. I extinguished the surrounding fires, then disintegrated the beam and knelt over him. Unsurprisingly, he showed no signs of injury- the dude is fireproof. His body was hot to the touch, air whooshing from his vents in an attempt to cool it. I generated copious amounts of water to douse him with, watching as the steam evaporated. 

"Minaeus, hey, Minaeus! Please wake up..."

He didn't respond, so I carefully tilted his head back, pouring more cold water down his throat. After several minutes of replenishing, his functions started up again and he took in shallow gasps of air, coughing out lungfuls of ash. I helped him sit up.

"Easy, there you go... Just lower the barrier so we can leave before it gets worse."

He shuddered as he recalibrated, rubbing his eyes. A fleeting expression of fear overtook him, and he checked his storage compartment before sighing in relief. A small, silver fish was swimming around obliviously.

      "... He's fine. I went into conservation mode to stabilize the temperature."

"What about you? Are _you_ alright?"

He glanced down at my legs, which were still straddling his hips, and then looked up with a smirk.

      "I am now~"

I shook my head, managing a laugh.

"You are unbelievable."

 

* * *

 

* * *

 

 

                          “Now that we're all situated, I'd like to begin. Mothers Nature, I commend your efforts at ecosystem restoration. In the past year alone, you've revived and/or created nearly fifteen _thousand_ species.

                                   “Thank you, but it wasn't just us.”

                           “Regardless, we should address our future plans. Anyone, feel free to make suggestions.”

      “I mean, we're going to bring back humans, right?”

...

“... If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'd like to have a word with Minaeus.”

He gave me a perplexed look as he lowered the barrier. I disappeared from the visible sector, poofing into him as we fused consciousness. He cleared his throat awkwardly, glancing around.

_“Dude, what's the big deal? Why- ff, why is this necessary? You into exhibitionism or something?”_

_“Minaeus, what the fuck? Humans?! HUMANS. Why?!”_

_“Ok, jeez, I forgot you could get that loud… I dunno, it just seems like the right thing to do.”_

_“In what sense is it right?”_

_“Don't we owe it to them? They're the reason we're here.”_

_“No! No, we don't owe them shit! They're the reason the planet was pushed past the brink of extinction!”_

_“But they're important; they were the most intelligent species capable of empathy and abstract thinking._

_They were meant to inherit the Earth; it needs them.”_

_“You know that's a lot of malarkey.”_

_“I... I don't understand.”_

He looked down at the table.

_“... What do you mean?”_

_“I don't know why I just said that. I don't know why I want to bring them back. I don't know why I even- I never wanted to, but...”_

_..._

_“God, there's something wrong with me.”_

_“No, no there isn't! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to belittle you.”_

_“No, Al, there's something wrong with me. I... It must be my programming._

_After all this time... Fuckers instilled their agenda on me, that's why- why I made that decision, why I let them deactivate me in the first place... I defaulted to subservience around them even after the controls were dismantled; I took every opportunity to please them and ensure their survival, regardless of the cost.”_

_“Are you sure? I mean, you're incredibly caring… It would make sense that you'd still want them to exist.”_

_“No, there's a difference between compassion and stupidity. I know damn well that they'd just end up killing everything again. I... You can get out of me now.”_

I complied, returning to my seat.

      “... I'd like you to forget I just said that. I had a lapse in judgement.”

            “Did ‘e tale you to change your mind?”

      “No, no. You wouldn't understand; you're all damn lucky you weren't made by humans.”

                    “Aren’t we still descendants of them, in a roundabout way?”

                                              “He’s human.”

“Astute observation.”

                                        “Alastair, I don't mean to sound insensitive, but... what are your thoughts on reviving homosapiens?”

“For the love of all things good, please don't. They- We had our chance.”

                                      "How do the rest of you feel about this issue? ISE, could you summarize?"

  **"I could."**

                                      "Now, please?"

    **"We've been over this before. They weren't _bad_ , per say; all life is inherently flawed. They made incredible advancements, but they were too dangerous for their own good.**

**... However, they inadvertently brought us into existence. We're doing what they failed to, surpassing their limitations, correcting their damage... I'd like to imagine that we're everything they wanted to be, when it comes down to it. The age of humanity is over. They fucked up past the point of no return, and the only reason we were able to fix their mistakes was a pair of supernatural gays. Now we can use our abilities to protect all organic beings and stabilize the universe as we know it, etc, etc."**

One droid started clapping tearfully.

                                        “... Seems everyone's in agreement here. Any objections?”

A couple shook their heads, and after several seconds of silence Persinna piped up.

                           “There is something else Eshe and I are planning.”

                                         “That so?”

Eshe took her hand, giving her an encouraging smile.

                           “After Egaltron was made, we started wondering what our fusion would be like. We had ISE crunch the numbers, and after running all possible simulations- and terminating them, of course- we discovered that we‘re a zero-risk coupling. In fact, our prospective child inherited positive characteristics in every outcome. What stood out most to us was the enhanced skill sets and adaptation of new traits, similar to biological evolution.

                           ... In short, we would like to bring this being into existence.”

            “Sounds good! We’ll structure a neural network and put it into the bot of your choice.”

“Your accent! But you weren't going to let us-”

            “Got a problem, eh? Don't be jaylous; you two were utt’rly incompatible, but you paved the way. Ya proved me wrong, Ally! The way I sees it, if you can, anyone can.”

“... Thanks, I think.”

                           “This is so exciting! It's like we're making a whole new type of person.”

            “I've been waiting for a chance to use my newest designs, so you're helping me.”

 

They departed together shortly after the meeting adjourned, and we followed, giving them space to talk amongst themselves.

“I can't believe I never noticed... Since they're, _you know..._  how do they-”

      “I don't think we're in a position to judge.”

“Hey, I wasn't judging!”

      “I judged your judging and I found it to be judgemental.”

I huffed, trying not to smile.

...

“What I still don't understand, though, is how everyone can be so different. Remember way back when we first met? You told me only humans care about self-expression, but it’s clear that these people do too. Why is that?”

      “... I might have exaggerated a bit. Lots of animals have unique identifiers, like scent and call, and they put effort into their appearances... but you know that. I can't think of a single droid from my era that resembled them. The algorithms that select their traits are as complex as DNA but more random; post-creation, they continue to redefine themselves, just like us. It’s a byproduct of quantum computing- the whole deep-learning thing means they evolve on their own. Pretty badass, if you ask me.”

I drifted after him, lost in my own thoughts. Finally, I paused, placing a hand on his arm. He stopped, glancing at me questioningly.

”Sorry, I- I don’t know how to say this, and I should’ve asked you long ago, but- when you... Back when you’d tell me about your traumas, you said she forced you to, you know, and I know you say you’re over it all, that you’re independent and you do what you want to, but it wasn’t until our conversation earlier that I- I’m sorry, I really am an idiot...”

      “Hey, no, it’s ok. Tell me.”

“... What if you’re only with me because of some sense of obligation? What if your mind has been tricking you into liking my weird ass for the past seventeen years?”

He paused, meeting my gaze with a hint of amusement.

_He’s well-accustomed to my malarkey, but I don’t know how he can stand it..._

      “Nah... You raise a valid point, but you have the wrong impression of what’s going on in my head. I’m honestly just gay as fuck. Maybe it’s your lack of existence and floaty transparency, maybe being reactivated voided it, or maybe certain humans could never trigger that response... but if you did, it would’ve been obvious from day one. I wouldn’t be capable of pissing you off, and that’d be tragic.”

...

”Sorry, I guess I was overthinking again... You’d think I’d’ve learned how to stop letting my issues distort my perception by now,” I muttered.

      “You have, for the most part. You can’t help being avoreable.”

”A what?”

      “Shhhhhh,” he murmured, pulling me in for a hug. The muscle tension I hadn’t noticed slowly eased, and I closed my eyes, reciprocating the gesture.

    **“[I love you, bitch. I ain’t ever gonna stop lovin’ you, bitch~]”**

I chortled, leaning up to meet his smooch.

”Likewise.”

 

The remainder of our trip was spent in comfortable silence, interrupted by the crunching of dirt under his boots, birds chirping, and gentle breeze carrying the ladies’ excited banter.

When we arrived, we sorta just idled around for an hour or so until they came out. The girl immediately dashed past us, giggling.

                           “This is Vida. Or, that was Vida.

                           Vida, sweetie, come say ‘hi’!”

                                        “Hiiii!!!”

She twirled around, rustling her loose, lengthy skirt. Her hair was black and long, and she wore a flare-sleeved white butterfly shirt. Incredibly large, iridescent wings unfurled from the external cell on her back, and she flew over the tall grass, hovering in place next to us. She beamed, eyes lime-green and smile radiantly white against her dark skin.

“My goodness, hello!”

                                        “I know you! But you don't know me.

                                        My name is Vida, and I love love lovvve plants and puppies and all forms of nature, but most importantly being alive!! So if you'll excuse me, I have some living to do! Bye!!!”

Her energy was contagious, and I couldn't help but grin as I waved farewell.

“She looks so... human. But otherworldly.”

      “Like me?”

“... Yeah, actually.”

              “Zat was ze plan! We based her external composition off of yours. You were wanting to attain that, no?”

      “Oh, wow. Yeah. But goddamn, you didn't tell us you were making _fairies._ How the hell did you pull that off?”

She winked.

                           “Unlike Egaltron, she has a single identity because we share the same system. It must've been difficult to fuse with a human.”

“... She acts so young. Granted, she was just awoken, but-”

                           “No, you're right. We're not sure if she'll mature, but she's happy, so-” She shrugged.

 

In the weeks to come, Vida showed enthusiasm for all forms of science, fluttering from place to place exploring and helping out. Her favorite spots are the greenhouses- the Ecocastle in particular. She loves to play music while she tends to the inhabitants, and sometimes she'll bring friends to stargaze with her. Minaeus enjoys her visits, but he's noticeably calmer around her. It's like she has opposite effects on us, heheh.

She's also obsessed with our dog. They go on grand adventures, and the friendship is mutual.

 

* * *

 

Today, a group of old infrastructure workers came to Ursa to get repurposed and fused into a similar body.

He refers to himself only as the Anime Granddad, sporting stylized white hair and a fabulous mustache. He typically wears hipster glasses, a floral shirt, and khakis. He's fuckin’ shredded, and an all-around cool guy. He took a liking to the arts- everything from writing to drawing and dance.

He's also very passionate about Vocaloid. They’re singing android characters from a kids’ series, or a band, or something… I don’t know, I was never in tune with the hip subculture trends of any generation.

 

I suspect this is the beginning of something grand.

 

* * *

 

Ursa replicated herself into half a dozen hot babes. I'm incredibly uncomfortable.

They're all her, but with different names, appearances, and demeanors. Unlike Ursa, they have stable voices and rarely work as engineers. They each oversee a section of inhabited robospace, but they stay synced to her cognition for instantaneous communication.

To quote them, “If you want something done right, do it yourself.”

 

* * *

 

Here’s another image I’d like to share, with no context:

Minaeus the size of a skyscraper, engaging with fluffy dinosaur hybrids like angry birds. Holding one in his hand bemusedly as it attacks his thumb, skin impenetrable. Petting its back until it falls asleep, then leaving it in Australia with all the other monstrous land creatures, because no robot dares live there. It’s our playground, so to speak. 


	11. Chapter 11

**June 8, 2402**

 

Last night, I was haunted by myself again. There was a noticeable absence of fear and guilt for the first time in my conscious memory. 

I found myself in the chamber like usual and cowered, preparing for another ass-kicking. It didn’t come. After several minutes, I lowered my arms to find him reclining against a wall, looking amused despite his dark, smokey aura and burning cyan eyes. 

              “You know, I loved to hate you, but I just haven't been feeling it anymore. Did you miss me?”

“I... Wait, I can talk.”

              “So you can! Congrats.”

“... Why did you come back?”

              “Because you suck. Actually, I don't know why I'm here. Do you?”

“Good god, this is absurd. What sort of psychological explanation is there for talking to yourself in dreams?

I... I’m actually aware of it for once. And you're not torturing me.”

I sat in the empty room, looking up at my ghostly figure.

               “This makes absolutely no sense. I'm going to try to wake up.”

He started sparking energy, but it quickly spiraled out of control. The room crumbled around us, his form began to solidify, and mine began to dissipate.

               “Unbelievable.”

I glanced over to find him now human, looking very much alive. The walls gave way to pure nothingness.

“This is some bullshit metaphor, isn't it?”

                “Knowing us, probably, yes.

                … I feel like I should apologize for tormenting and killing you repeatedly, but seeing as I am both you and a figment of your imagination, I'm not sure it’s worth anything. And you did have it coming- no offense. You're not as terrible as I thought you were; at least, not anymore. You're no saint, either, just... neutral. You're ok.”

“Thanks... Seriously, though, what’s going on?”

                “I told you; I don't know. You need to stop watching those shitty sci-fi thrillers.”

I blinked once, and saw nothing, not even him. Just void. I blinked again, and suddenly we were in a familiar-looking house. He sat in a rocking chair, looking out the window while a grey and white cat slinked out from behind it, rubbing against his legs and chirping. He picked her up, nuzzling his nose to hers before placing her on his lap. He stroked her with one hand, opening up a small book with the other and steadying it on the arm of the chair, beginning to write.

“I- Is that...”

He no longer seemed aware of my presence or lack thereof. I tried to enter the space, but everything went blank and I felt like I was getting shocked by a thousand fleece sweaters. When it passed, I found myself in his exact position. I dropped the book, picking her up and cradling her to my chest. She purred, flicking her tongue lightly against my chin. All of my senses were intact- the room smelled like old lady perfume and potpourri, and she was silky soft and warm. There was a warbler singing in the tree outside my window, and I realized he was gone. Or, I was gone. I concluded that we'd become one person again.

“... Sophie, I- missed you something awful, I- I never thought I’d see you again. I don't care what's happening, I love you- so much, angel...”

I wiped my tears into the shoulder of my shirt, noticing that I was now wearing a different outfit. The chair was ginormous, and I couldn't even see out the window anymore.

“Hoppin’ halibuts!” I squeaked.

_Oh god, not the awkward preteen voice._

She nuzzled against me, larger in proportion but still purring contently.

           “Al, dear, what’s wrong?”

I looked behind me, and suddenly I was on a ranch, facing a kindly woman. My arms were empty, and I was back to my default. I dashed towards her thoughtlessly, initiating a hug.

“Anna! God, this is so wonderful. I can’t believe you’re back!”

           “Back? We never left, silly!”

     “Ok, make room, comin’ through.”

She laughed, pulling me aside slightly so Winston could join. One of the dogs jumped up against me excitedly.

“I, I can hardly express-”

           “Shhh. It's ok.”

I continued to be a gross, snively mess.

     “... I hate to ruin the moment, but the tea’s getting cold. Are you coming in soon?”

           “Of course! Come on, love.”

I followed them, but once I stepped through the threshold, the scenery changed again. I was a long-forgotten room, illuminated only by a fireplace. Sophie slept soundly on the oval rug next to it.

                                “Don't just stand there! ‘ave a seat, chickie.”

                                Yes, you've earned an adult chair. Our little scholar… You turned into such a fine young man.”

Their heavy Welsh accents struck a chord in my heart, prickly heat giving me goosebumps.

                        “We couldn't be prouder... We're so sorry you had to find your way without us.”

They appeared to have aged in accordance with their years over me. Hot tears blurred my vision, and I couldn't stop shaking. I tried to speak several times before succeeding, voice cracking.

“You deserved so much better... It wasn't fair-”

                        “Cachu yn digwydd. We had a good run, and I think we were pretty fortunate compared to most.”

“I'm sorry I was so horrible- I never appreciated you, and you gave me such a happy childhood… You showed me how to be kind and curious, and I wish I had better expressed my appreciation and love.”

                        “There's no use dwellin’ on it; besides, all children are stupid lit’l twits.

                        ... Gracious, you really wanted to hear me say that.”

“I'm so confused, I- You were much younger. I don't know how- I couldn't remember you for centuries, and it was killing me, but-”

                                   “Would you prefer us the way we were?”

I glanced back up, and they were in their twenties again, wearing outfits I vaguely recalled.

“... Oh, god.”

               “Al, that's no way to address your folks!”

I practically jumped as a youthful Anna walked in from the kitchen, carrying a tray with tea and sugar. She placed it on the table, and the three of us stood awkwardly next to the empty chair.

      “... Next time, you're coming to our place.”

                                   “Very well.”

“Not to be rude, but I still don't know why this is happening or how it's even possible. I had next to no recollection of- my childhood. Now everyone's the same age, and I'm not sure what to think about that, either. You're all here, and I couldn't be happier, but… I mean, it's clearly not real, and I'm talking to myself-”

                          “We're real enough, aren't we?”

      “Here's my theory- er, what would be my theory: you somehow managed to unscrew your subconscious and access repressed memories! You constructed us out of everything you observed, which was a lot in my and Anna’s case, so, yeah, I'd say we're pretty damn real.”

My parents exchanged an uncomfortable glance.

               “... So, he can learn how to actively construct his dreams? People and places and activities alike? Jeez! That's a lot to process.”

      “The number of folks he'll hug and cry over is no less than the population of Rhode Island; hence, my proposal. Give ‘em a proper dreamscape to congregate in.”

I slid down the wall, sitting on the floor in a state of shock.

               “Al? Al, say something.”

...

After another moment of silence, she nudged me gently with her foot.

“... Sacrilegious shih tzus shitting shiitake ‘shrooms.”

                            “Language!  
  
                            ... Ah, who am I kiddin’?”

      “You alright, chap?”

               “Oh dear, he’s doing it again.”

I blinked, looking around in a panicked stupor.

“... I don't want to wake up. No, I can’t lose you again. I can’t! Please, don’t go, I- can feel our time running out, like grains of sand in an hourglass. Is there anything you can do? Stop me, please, don’t let me end this. I’m so sorry, even if this is just a dream... I love you all, and I've missed you beyond words; I never thought I'd see you again, but now-”

Sophie had curled up beside me, and I stroked her shakily.

                                         “We know, scruffy. Everything’s ok. And we're not leavin’! You don't have to fear forgetting any longer. We will always be here with you- all of us.”

                           “We promise!”

“I... Right. I'll be back, then.”

               “Bring your hubby next time!”

“W-”

 

  
I opened my eyes, burning slightly from the excess tears. He was out cold, the soft glow illuminating his features as he held me to his chest. I lay my head back down and nestled closer, feeling like something deep and far away had finally healed.

 


	12. Chapter 12

Hey, bastard child here. I figured it would be fitting to follow in my flamboyant father’s footsteps by finishing this log.

He kept a private archive in their database and transferred every newest entry digitally via mecha dad. They gave me the access key and permission to embarrass them posthumous, so I took the liberty of compiling these choice excerpts into four abridged logs for the general public, since the original was hundreds of thousands of pages long and I doubt you have the attention or lifespan to finish it. I'd like to make a second set in this style, because there are more sicknasty events than I could ever hope to fit in here.

I’ve tampered with the content to add details, summarize chunks, and make corrections with the help of Minaeus’s vast memory bank. He took a metric fuckton of photos and videos as well, but I’ve yet to figure out a way to get them out of my head and into files… so, for now you’ll just have to enjoy my wonderful portal-colored shitart. (You’re welcome.)

Also, if you're reading this, my experiment was a success and Ursa didn't kill me. Greetings from the very, very distant future in which is likely an alternative timeline. Dunno how that works, or if it's a thing at all, but since I essentially retconned this shit for you to give you a chance to fix things before it’s too late, uh. Take care of your planet, and stop popping out mini-humans. Plastic is bad and so are cars, fossil fuels, and meat. Don’t buy bs or toss non-biodegradables, yadayadayada... Actual scientists can give you better tips.

You're all gonna die, so make the most of your lives and at least try to leave the place a little better than you found it. Be warned that if my ghost half catches you littering or throwing recyclables in the trash, it ain’t gonna end well. I put up this beta version for free in the hopes of reaching more people, since most nerds with potential spend hours here reading homoerotic stories. Any profits I make off publications are set up to fund do-gooders, so don't be a dick and steal it.

… Anyway. The next log is a lot less structured, so I figured this would be a good place to add commentary.

They're gone, obviously. They lived longer than anyone probably should have. I don't know how they weren't bored to death or driven to insanity, confined to this planet for a _billion_ years. They probably fucked a lot to pass time.

… Ok, I should really stop talking about them like that. They were the legendary immortals, the gods of Life and Void, the guardians of Earth. I am honestly proud to share their traits, and I admit that they were fucking awesome. Their legacy will live on forever, if I have any say over it. I've already begun to design my successor.

I resented them initially, but for good reason. As Alastair portrayed, I was going through a heavy existential crisis and struggling to have my own identity while their separate thoughts, memories, personalities, and emotions swirled around in my mind. While I never got to live like them, I might as well have because these pseudo-experiences were beyond vicarious.

Despite my difficulties, I’ve always been in love with myself because they were so fucking gay for each other. I've referred to them with paternal terms around others because it felt less alienating than using my old names; I stopped with the daddy jokes once they became more awkward than ironic. Make no mistake- we never had a "family" dynamic, and I'm not their son, heh...

I learned to balance them out eventually, all their good and bad. My sense of self emerged from the equilibrium, unique from either of theirs. I feel most connected to them when I channel their powers, coursing with their very essence. I am their soul spark. It is me.

Oh, right- you probably want to know how they went out. I'll keep it short and sweet: the sun was dying, and it would have destroyed everything in its wake. Minaeus went giga in fusion and they sacrificed themselves to restore it to its younger state, ensuring the survival of their galaxy for trillions of years to come. They were able to prepare far in advance, and I don't think they were phased by meeting their (final) demise. I'd wager they were pretty content with it, actually. They'd done and experienced everything good on the planet, and I imagine daily life had become monotonous. They had each other in the end, and, well, yeah.

I'll close here. I might keep records, too, of my space explorations and our future endeavors. Hell, maybe we'll have a dynasty of diary-bearing droids.

 

Egaltron out.

  
D=> ~~~~~~~

 

 


End file.
